Kimberly Sellnow

Your ABC's to Life...

2011-05-12T06:44:00.000-05:00

Always be true to yourself

Believe that anything and everything is possible

Consider healing people instead of hurting people

Don't subject yourself to nothing but the best

Enjoy every moment god has given to you

Find out what your truly passionate about and go for it

Great things come to wait

Happiness is not just for the rich and successful people

Indulge yourself one in a while... your worth it!

Justify nothing. We all make mistakes

Keep moving, standing still gets you nowhere.

Live life to your fullest potential... we all believe you can!

Make every moment count.

Never give up...Your answer is just around the corner.

Open your heart to live, love and laugh.

Patience is the key to becoming successful in all aspects of life.

Quitting isn't always a bad thing. Giving up is!

Remember to love yourself first.

Start now. Tomorrow is a long time away.

Take time to smell the lilies.

Understand that life is a game to be won and so we shall.

Victory is close at hand

Wish for peace in the world, not more war.

Xcellent is in your frame of mind.

You are the only one who can make it happen! Have faith.

Zero is the number of times you will feel sorry or bad about yourself.

You are god's creation and with that his love and light is within you. Although it may be hard to find sometimes, it will be shown to you when you need it most. All you need is a little faith!

~Crystal Arsenault~

These precious words of Wisdom come from The Wisdom Project Tribe member Crystal Arsenault. We hope you will take but a very few moments out of your day to embrace this beautiful poem and be inspired. Thank you Crystal for sharing a bit of amazing wisdom in your heart!

Where Is Your Measure?

2011-01-27T22:31:00.000-06:00

The ultimate measure of man is not where he stands in moments of comfort & convenience but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
~Martin Luther King Jr.

How about you? Who are you and how do you respond during the good times? This is important. Who are you and how do you respond during the hard times? During the character building days? When the worst of times is staring you in the face? This is your measure.

Can You Feel Better in One Minute???

2011-01-13T15:14:00.000-06:00

Yes you can! It only takes one minute. Honest.

In this High-Tech microwave society, we want everything in an instant. We want to build our business to a profitable level as fast as possible – we want to quickly contact our children with an urgent message – we want our fast food prepped in the drive through in no time at all. Feeling good can happen on the spot as well. The good news? You are in control! Woo Hoo!

If you are like me, you too would appreciate adding some very simple things to your life that are certain to help you feel better…in less than one minute. Give one of these a try today.

In one minute you could…

BE GRATEFUL – Write in a gratitude journal 3 things you are most thankful for OR write a friend a thank you note.

RELAX – Close your eyes, breathe deeply and slowly three times.

CONNECT – Pick up the phone to call someone you haven’t seen in a while.

GAIN PERSPECTIVE – Look out the window toward the horizon and allow your mind to drift away.

THINK ABOUT YOU – List 3 things you like most about YOU.

Now it's YOUR turn....We value your wisdom. What would you add to this list??

Inspirational Wisdom for a Remarkable Year…

2011-01-01T19:50:00.000-06:00

Fresh blank calendar pages have been placed before you. The year 2011 is here. How will YOU fill in the days?

What do you need to STOP doing to make this year remarkable?

What do you need to START doing to make this year extraordinary?

The Wisdom Project is on a mission to Connect people through the Sharing of personal wisdom gained from life experiences, so together we can ignite Inspiration around the world. Imagine an enormous united group striving to give hope and encouragement to others to help them move forward in life! We would like to offer some inspirational wisdom each person is able to apply during the New Year:

Dare to be Happy.
Love more; Smile more; Appreciate more
Don’t believe all you hear and don’t spend all you have.
When you say “I love you”…MEAN IT.
When you say “I’m sorry”…look the person in the eye.
Be patient with you. Allow yourself the room to grow.
Enjoy the journey – there are valuable lessons in both the highs and the lows.
Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much.
Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
Don’t judge people by their relatives.
Love deeply and passionately - you might get hurt but it’s the only way to live life completely.
When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
Be nice to YOU - take time to recharge, refresh and renew.
Love everyone where they are at - you don't know what someone is going through until you walk a mile in his shoes.
Remember the three A's all humans are looking for - Appreciation, Approval, and Acceptance.

Connect - Share - Inspire...The Wisdom Project

Now it's YOUR turn...We value your wisdom. What would you add to this list??

Spilling the beans: A look inside The Wisdom Project 2010

2010-12-31T00:08:00.000-06:00

Once upon a time, in a land called the United States, there was a woman who sat comfortably in her comfortable home in her comfortable chair, holding her comfortable coffee cup in hand, looking out to the familiar scene in her backyard reflecting on her comfortable life, content with the beautiful blessings all around her in the life she had created. With a smile flowing from ear to ear, a little voice exploded into her head at the same level as a roaring freight train running at full throttle… “What are you doing with the gifts and strengths you have been given? Are you living your potential? Is this really what life is all about….for YOU?

This final week of the calendar year 2010 was a perfect time to look back to where life was prior to The Wisdom Project and just how much this international venture has impacted my “comfortable” life.

The Wisdom Project was birthed March 2010 in Sydney, Australia. In 10 months….

I have been connecting, learning, growing, giving, reading, writing, speaking, inspiring and encouraging…
All the while still being a mom, chef, taxi driver, calendar manager, housekeeper, friend and daughter.
Each day I Tweet, Facebook, blog, text, Skype, email, and/or talk on the phone…
I laugh, cry, get interrupted unexpectedly, and show both frustration and joy…
And I receive the most amazing messages of love and support from The Wisdom Tribe.
Life still happens and it sometimes requires “inked events” on the calendar to get postponed.
My vision gets bigger each day.
Although I should be thrilled that the team is working diligently to edit these phenomenal stories for the first book, my DNA continues to rev its engine, trying to remember that quality takes time.
The people I have connected with are some of the most amazing people in the world…truly.
The stories from the contributors have touched my heart like nothing else…
And in 2011, I will put these pieces of artwork into a book and share them with the world.
The power in the potential of this project gives me chills (at times) when thinking of its enormity.
I've learned that getting outside once a day is absolutely necessary, even with deadlines…and
When people say social media is killing relationships, I laugh, and stand tall knowing the rich relationships I have made through it are for forever.
2010 has revealed that a whirlpool bath, a glass of wine and an iPod are fantastic rewards for powering through some days.
Not every day is easy and fulfilling…but this journey is worth the fight.
I will continue to smile, grow, connect, give and pour all my heart and soul into The Wisdom Project because I believe that together we can ignite inspiration around the globe to encourage people to take a step forward in life.

CONNECT – SHARE – INSPIRE…HAPPY NEW YEAR

HOW ABOUT YOU?

How has your life been improved in 2010? What does 2011 hold for you??

2010-12-24T09:42:00.000-06:00

A very Merry Christmas to each of you! We are so grateful for the beauty you add to our life. May 2011 be your best year ever, filled with magic moments and spectacular achievements. Remember to love each person where they are at. Give a smile to each person you meet. Make your days count. Life may not be perfect but it is still a gift.

The BEattitudes for the Season

BE Grateful

BE Loving

BE Wise

BE Kind

BE Patient

BE Forgiving

BE Happy

BE YOU

We love you.

The Wisdom of our Deepest Fear....

2010-11-22T21:25:00.000-06:00

This widely acclaimed poem is actually not a poem at all, but an excerpt from A Return To Love, a book by motivational speaker and author Marianne Williamson. The passage has such inspirational power that it is now a stand-alone mantra for a generation of exceptional individuals who wish to motivate themselves and others to live up to their fullest potential.

Our Deepest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

How about you... How has your biggest fear defined your self image?

What do you do when life throws dirt at you?

2010-11-15T15:53:00.000-06:00

...Once there was a donkey that fell in a very large hole. The farmer did not know what to do. He simply decided the best thing was to bury the donkey. He began to shovel dirt into the hole. At first the donkey panicked – he was being buried alive! How could the farmer do such a cruel thing to him?

The dirt was getting very heavy on the donkeys back so he shook the dirt off. The farmer continued to shovel the dirt into the hole and the donkey shook it off – a shovel of dirt, a shake off by the donkey, another shovel, another shake. Soon the dirt began to pile up under the donkeys feet. He realized that each time he shook the dirt off his back, the mound beneath him got taller and if he chose to step up onto the mound, he got closer to the top of the hole. The farmer shoveled the dirt, the donkey shook it off and stepped up…higher and higher the donkey went. Shovel of dirt, shake it off, step up…shovel of dirt, shake it off, step up. Shovel, shake, step up – shovel, shake, step up. Finally the donkey was standing so tall he could walk freely and easily out of the very hole he feared would bury him alive.

Life can throw dirt at us. We can feel buried by challenges and trials and feel like giving up. But we can also use the dirt that is thrown at us, to build character and rise up. Sooner or later dirt will be thrown at you, but what you do with it is up to you. You can use it to build your future or cover your grave.

What do you do when life throws dirt at you? Do you shake it off and step up on it? Remember, with each step up, you are closer to the top. Wisdom is the view from the hilltop with much dirt under your feet.

Shake it off and step up – Shake it off and step up – Shake it off and step up

Nothing Happens by Accident...

2010-10-21T16:55:00.000-05:00

The number of positive, inspirational and motivating books in my house is greater than 500. (I know because my 12 year old counted them when there was “nothing to do” on holiday break from school.) Interestingly enough, none of those fabulous masterpieces can be of use to me if I don’t grab the book with my hands, open the book and physically read the words. The wisdom does not mysteriously float into my brain on its own. I must take action steps to obtain the teaching.

Nothing Happens by Accident

I love the teachings of Kim Lavine – go-getter, one-of-a-kind, living across “the pond” from me (i.e. = Lake Michigan) Mommy Millionair. Ms. Lavine shared in a recent blog that the Yiddish word “mac-krae” means:

Nothing Happens by Accident

My very first thought to that statement was ‘How true’. I’m going to be rather bold here and make a statement that is wrapped in love but comes straight from my heart: All the desire and passion in our heart to accomplish our goals cannot and will not ever come to fruition while sitting on the sofa. Having good intentions, a grateful heart and heaps of positive thoughts and words are very useful – quite honestly, they are considered, by most including myself, to be the first step on the staircase to success. Yet, until we get up off the sofa and start walking, all those good intentions are only, well….good intentions. The action is missing. We may be able to see the top of our Success Staircase and believe with all our heart and soul it is obtainable. YES! That is the right attitude. But how are you going to get there when you are standing on the first step?

Nothing Happens by Accident

What are your goals? What is at the top of your staircase? What would your world look like if you started climbing, step by step, toward your dreams? …And think on this: How many other people might be inspired to do the same when they see YOU stepping up?

Now it’s YOUR turn…

We want to know…What is YOUR next step on your staircase to your goals and dreams?

What Lens Are You Looking Through??

2010-10-07T16:00:00.000-05:00

Autumn is now in full swing and quite evident here in the Midwestern portion of the United States where I live. A renovation of the landscape is occurring. The leaves on the trees are changing from emerald to golden amber, burnt orange and fiery crimson and soon they will flutter to the ground when the brisk autumn breeze blows. Whistles and cheers reverberate through the chilly air at the Friday night school football games and a crackling of the logs in the fire pit mesmerize all who stop to feel its warmth. As a rare exception, this year an over abundance of rain fell in our region recently. Thus, we uncharacteristically have areas of devastating flooding with some major roadways near the many lakes and rivers in our state.

Today I drove some friends to the airport and realized for the first time, the incredible amount of excess water pouring over the banks of a major nearby river. It was shocking to see only the very tops of twenty and thirty foot trees waving above the rushing water, parks completely immersed no longer visible to the eye, and in one area…the water seemed to continue forever into the horizon.

My route home included crossing a hefty bridge. That was the moment my eyes were opened to the devastation that will linger for citizens in our area for months to come. The headline of every news program, for the last week and a half, included stories of the destruction and ruin. However, this truly was the first time I had witnessed it with my own eyes. The actual visual changed my perspective completely. I have been so consumed with the flood of messages, activities and demands of my own small world; I failed to grasp the bigger picture of how people around me could be endangered and hurting from this natural disaster.

"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." ~Marcel Proust

What have your eyes been “seeing”? What “lens” are you looking through?

A friend of mine told me about a miscommunication with a client. He rescheduled a meeting to another time...however the client did not receive the message for some reason. When my friend and his client did connect via mobile, they both agreed to still meet that evening. Amidst the obstacles, the meeting ensued...the result? An incredible evening with much forward progress in life for both participants.

Many times in such an event, we find people angry, hostile and bitter about the miscommunication because it inconvenienced them or interrupted their other plans. We often look at the situation from our own lenses that have not been cleaned for quite some time. We have not taken note as to how many times our own finger prints have touched the lens - how many times we were thinking of our self and the inconvenience which was placed on our own life.

The wisdom I found is that these very finger prints obstruct us from visualizing a clear picture of the beautiful possibilities which could occur.

What have your eyes been “seeing”? What “lens” are you looking through?

I recently met a lovely woman from London, Tina Andretta, who takes pleasure in devouring positive reading material to learn and grow. Her most recent book seemed to create an eye-opening experience - almost like putting on a new set of lenses for the first time. Tina shared, “New eyes are a result of renewed self belief and self image - Going back to the fact that we do not see with our eyes, but with our brains. ...A few months ago I would have written this comment based on theory only, and now I'm talking from experience. Since my belief system around who I am and what I'm capable of has changed, the whole world is taking on new form. My life has totally changed in the last 2 months, and it's ABSOLUTELY because my self-image has DRAMATICALLY improved.”

Tina now sees new possibilities in the world – more beauty around her. Possibly it is her positive reading material which has cleared her “life lens”. Her new vision is magnificent.

Now it is YOUR turn…
What have your eyes been “seeing”? What “lens” are you looking through? We look forward to hearing your experience.

The Wisdom in Living Life Out Loud...

2010-09-14T19:16:00.000-05:00

Yesterday the question was asked, “Do you fear success or failure”? In her blog, my amazing friend Carol Roth responded with, “Maybe you should fear mediocrity”. Just saying the word ‘mediocrity’ makes me cringe – always has and probably always will. There seems to be something about the way I was created that refuses to accept average.

Back in March of 2010, I began to walk down a whole new path when a business colleague and I gave birth to an idea called The Wisdom Project. After spending a week in the amazing city of Sydney, Australia, I began collecting stories of Wisdom from women all around the globe for my first book. With each new day, each new friend I made and each new story I received, a passion began to reveal itself inside me. Today I share this deep passion that is festering inside; it is the heartfelt desire to encourage and inspire people to “Take a step forward in life instead of a step backward…or worse yet…remain idle”.

Idleness – accepting average – living in mediocrity…not for me. It pains me to type those words. Life is too short to live in mediocrity. Don't you think life is meant to be lived out loud, to the fullest?

I believe each person was born with a unique DNA. I believe it is time that each of us begin to embrace our own special DNA live life to the full. Of course that may look a little different to each person; Some will live life out loud with their hair on fire whilst skiing down a mountain at top speed. Others will host a quaint dinner party with glitz and glam and make the headlines of a spectacular lifestyle magazine. Still others will find their true DNA by giving endless smiles and words of gratitude to every person in the airport to make people wonder if they really ARE up to something!

How about YOU? How will you use your awesomely gorgeous DNA to live your life out loud and show other that life is too short to live in mediocrity??? Please share your thoughts - We can’t wait to hear YOUR ‘life out loud’ moments!

PS- Thanks Carol Roth for your inspiration and example of living life out loud!

PPS- Thanks Liz Strauss for the amazing Successful Online Blogger award! I value the amazing SOBCon family for how they challenge each other to be more and do more. It’s an honor!

The Wisdom in Flying...

2010-09-09T18:43:00.000-05:00

In America, the month of September usually brings a bit cooler temperatures with the approach of autumn and children return to school after a long summer break. Many hearts begin to reflect and remember with the onset of the 11^th day of September. As a nation we each remember that day back in 2001 in a different way – each person knows where they were and what they were doing when the tragedy occurred.

Today I spoke with a dear friend who is an airplane pilot. We talked of many changes in the airline industry. Of course not all these changes are the result of September 11^th ; the economy has played its role. The fact remains that when we enter an airport, the scene has changed.

One thing I have decided to always pack when travelling is my patience. Some very simple things help me be more patient when I need to fly:

I arrive earlier than needed to the airport.
I put a on a smile with EVERYONE I speak to.
I chose not to react when the other people in line small, loud children or too many bags.
I pick the shortest line in security, place my belongings on the conveyor belt and when the guy in front of me still beeps after walking through the sensor machine 6 times….I count to 10 and think about the beach.
I try my best to be the MOST outgoing and pleasant person that airport employee has encountered all week.

Now It’s YOUR turn…

We want to hear your Wisdom. What do YOU pack when flying to a new destination to help your travel experience be amazing??

The Wisdom of Love...

2010-08-15T18:33:00.000-05:00

One of the strongest experiences you can have driving in your car, is the day you bring your new born child home from the hospital after giving birth. The weight of the new responsibility sits firmly on your shoulders. At each intersection of the drive, you offer one extra glance to the right and to the left before proceeding, giving care to accelerate as smoothly as possible. The sky looks bluer than you’ve ever seen, the sun feels warmer than you’ve ever felt, the air smells fresher than you can remember and your heart is overflowing with joyful sensations.

It’s undeniable - THIS is LOVE.

The days, weeks and months pass while raising this child, offering a rainbow of emotions from anxiety to zeal. Your patience is tested and you are asked to make decisions not for yourself but what is best for another. Many times you awake in the middle of the night, shuffle to this child’s room and find peace within when you see them fast asleep. The tears well up as you feel their innocence.

It’s undeniable – THIS is LOVE.

As the months fade into years you often find yourself looking back on the beautiful memories of this child that made you laugh and even the ones that made you cry. The time passes quickly – each day seemingly faster than the one before. You have poured your heart and soul and breath of life into this child only to wake up one day and realize it was YOU who was given life.

It’s undeniable – THIS is LOVE.

We are called not only to love the children but each and every individual around us. It matters not if this assignment is easy or difficult – the stem hampered with thorns, still produces a captivating rose. Isn’t it time we take our eyes off ourselves and truly “see” another?

It’s undeniable – THIS is LOVE.

The Wisdom in Daring to Be More...

2010-08-01T14:16:00.000-05:00

"Whatever you do, or dream you can do, begin it! Boldness has genius and power and magic in it." ~Goethe

Today is a new day. Tomorrow is gone.

What can you dare to change and begin today?

A world of thanks to Mari Smith for revealing this extraordinary video. Its beauty and message beg to be pass along. May you allow the Wisdom this video contains, to speak to your heart.

What thoughts, comments, or wisdom would you like to share about Daring to Be More:

The Wisdom in Your Potential...

2010-07-28T17:32:00.000-05:00

"There are two great days in a person's life ... the day we are born, and the day we discover why.” ~William Barclay

You ask, “Why what?” Why you were created the way you were created? Why you have the unique DNA that you have? Why you have these dreams in your heart? Why you have this urge inside to unleash the potential and go after your passion?

What is YOUR why? What is your potential?

After pondering a bit on these questions, I thought I would share with you some wisdom I have found. Four steps to begin to find your why…your potential:

1. Define who you are….what do you value most in life?

These could be qualities like openness, honesty, and trustworthiness, or traits like creativity, focus and aptitude. Think of your best friend. What characteristics does he/she display that you value/appreciate?

2. Identify your strengths….what are you really good at doing?

Some people can make the most incredibly attractive scrapbooks of their children’s activities. They just know the right colours, shapes, and tag lines to create a treasured keepsake of memories. Other people are a total wiz on the computer and ‘wow’ me with how quickly they can assess and FIX hardware and software quandaries. Still others have the patience to spend an entire day with 25 first graders on a field trip to the biggest museum in town, and walk away with a smile on their face and a spring in their step.

3. Discover what you know…life has taught you much; you know more than you think.
I have one child who is good at spelling. (The other child…not so much.) It is rather effortless for my youngest to do well on spelling tests and Spelling Bees. She is no National Bee champ or anything like that, but plain and simple, she knows how to spell some fairly difficult words.

4. Acknowledge your uniqueness…there is only one YOU.

The marvelous Liz Strauss says, “Know who you are and where you stand – claim your space.” The amazing Marianne Williamson says, “We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what's wrong in your life, or you can focus on what's right.”

What is YOUR why? What is your potential?

The legendary speaker Tony Robbins began a new series on television this week called Breakthrough. Watching Tony pour his heart into the featured married couple was inspiring and encouraging. Everyone watching the episode could see the potential of these two people. One of my favorite quotes by Mr. Robbins… “Life is found in the dance between your deepest desire and your greatest fear."

Can you learn to dance with your potential?
If inside, you feel that you were made for more, but are afraid to move, I encourage you to decide today to take that first step into the unknown. Then take another step.

…Step even when you are afraid.
…Step when you are insecure.
…Step when you are safe.
…Step when it’s stormy.
…Step when you don't see what's coming.

Before long, you will find that each step you take weaves together to create a beautiful dance...a dance that is your amazing life…a dance that is uniquely YOU. I look forward to the day when I see you teaching others to dance too.

Now it’s your turn...

What wisdom have you gained in dancing with your potential?

The Wisdom in Change...

2010-07-14T23:05:00.000-05:00

As the old saying goes...The fastest way from point A to point B is a straight line. Let me ask you a question. When was the last time in your life you got from point A to point B on a path that was straight, quick and uneventful? Or do your journeys sometimes consist of an intermittent rendezvous in the road ditch, a ‘critter’ or two popping out from nowhere to make you swerve, or do you find yourself meandering through the curves of the path with an occasional stop at the famed ‘look-out’ point??? I thought so. Me too.

Changes will occur on your journey from point A to point B.

Many times I have heard people (myself included) talk about how they started down a new road going after a new point B and suddenly life “got in the way”. They were forced to slow down or take a different route. A significant change had occurred they were not expecting. There are times when I’ve been traveling down a road to my point B, found the strength to keep life events from forcing me off course, but then woke up one day in the ditch alongside of my trusty road which I knew would bring me to the Promised Land. That’s when the voice in our head says “Hey, this isn’t so bad. I can see my path – it is right there next to me. I’ll be fine over here for a bit because it only takes a little hop to get back on track.”

Changes will occur on your journey from point A to point B.

Last week, my kids wanted to play Mario Cart Wii and challenged mom to a race. Of course since I am only a wee bit competitive (Ha Ha!) I agreed to their offer...as I was hungry for a win, even if it meant toasting my kids at Wii. (keeping it real here) The race course they chose had many twists, turns and obstacles. Some of the corners required a very sharp turn. My constant over reaction coupled with inertia sent my car onto the grassy area next to the race track on several occasions. My adorable little Mii (pronounced Me for those who have not had the Wii (We) experience) in my super fast roadster was driving right next to the path, but the grassy area slowed my vehicle to a snail’s pace. The other cars on the track would wiz by Mii. Eventually I found myself in 12th place...out of 12 cars! Who knew that one could drive SO CLOSE to the original path, thinking they were doing JUST FINE only to find they really were not part of the race at all! A slight change in the course (grass in this case) made all the difference. Going from point A to point B included a change in the ground beneath me, which I did not expect.

Changes will occur on your journey from point A to point B.

Me? (or Mii?)

I’d like to share some wisdom I have learned in life. The principle goes something like this: we first need to be A-ware of something then we can B-eware of it. For example, if we are first A-ware that change is constantly happening in our lives, then we can B-eware of how we are dealing with change...are we Reacting or Responding...are we Listening or Talking...are we under control or out of control. The result: Life experience has made me aware that change is a part of my life. Period. Thus, I choose to beware of how I deal with the changes when they happen. The goal (which I will most likely continue to pursue always): become a master of change for my own life.

Now it’s your turn...

What is your relationship with change? How do you deal with the change when you find yourself in the unexpected grassy area next to the path you want to travel? What wisdom have you gained from experiencing changes going from point A to point B? We’d love to hear your wisdom.

The Wisdom in the Road Construction of Life..

2010-07-07T23:00:00.000-05:00

Living in the Midwest portion of the United States, we experience four unique seasons. They are commonly referred to as Winter, Winter, Winter and Road Construction. You know you are in the middle of Road Construction season when the interstate traffic is moving quickly and freely and then, without warning, you need to apply the brakes forcefully and come to a screeching halt.

Recently, as I drove across the city, twice I encountered big orange signs reading “Road Work Ahead” and “Detour” - I was already 15 minutes behind schedule – my heart sank. As I began to slow, I realized that the detour was not for the interstate I was driving. Instead, I shared in the pains of heavy traffic because I was driving on the road that was the rerouted destination for the detour folks. Then to add to the mess, just two miles ahead, road work was happening and three lanes of traffic were forced to merge down to two. All this activity forced road users to a snail’s pace. The road construction severely hindered my progress and there was nothing I could do about it.

I would imagine you also have found yourself, crawling along some stretch of highway moving ever so slowly because road work was near. Possibly you have felt the discouragement as you watched the minutes tick by on the clock and realized the situation was out of your control.

This experience illustrates an important life principle we can learn from. When road construction is encountered in your life, the best route is to:

Expect it, Accept it and Move through it to find the open highway.

The reality is that all of us have or will experience some type of road construction in our life. It could be some basic “Road Work Ahead” like when things get really busy at work and we need to put in some extra hours. Usually this “Road Work” is a temporary inconvenience. Other times the fast lane may be closed for a bit requiring us to “Merge”. Watch out for the “Merge” in life as it has a tendency to create indecisiveness – should I do this or should I do that. On occasion we encounter bigger surprises when we are required to take a “Detour” and reroute our course. When unforeseen “Detours” happen in life - they take us along unfamiliar territory. A new road can seem to go on forever and our faith is tested. We may experience thoughts of doubt because we can’t see how or when we will get back on the main road.

The challenge comes when we find ourselves in the construction season being forced deal with it. This is where the “Expect It – Accept It – Move Through It” principle comes in.

Expect It – The reality is that our roads will deteriorate and need to have maintenance done on them. Just like you and I will find challenges along the way in our life. We just don’t know what the challenge will be or where the detour will take us.
Accept It – Maintaining the right frame of mind during the road work of life has the potential to alleviate stress and make a tough situation seem easier. Maya Lin said, “To fly, we have to have resistance.”
Move Through It – Remember Dory from the movie “Finding Nemo”? Does this sound familiar…”Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.” Our kids got the message, how about you? Once we move through the congestion, unfamiliar detour route, and bumpy roads we are sure to find open highway.

So until the next big orange construction sign pops up in your life, remember:

Expect it, Accept it and then Move Through it to find the open highway on the other side.

The Wisdom of Appreciation...

2010-06-28T18:01:00.000-05:00

Appreciation:

The recognition of the quality, value, significance or magnitude of people and things

Recognition of the quality or value of things:

Many people picture a brilliant diamond when thinking of something of value. Recently, I met some wonderful people from South Africa who were enamored with my name. They were giddy when telling me of the world renowned Kimberley Mine in Kimberley, North Cape, South Africa and the Argyle Diamond Mine in Kimberley, in the far north-east of Western Australia. With their eyes, they expressed the value they held of these diamond mines. They conveyed a whole new appreciation for my name and shared such love when talking of my potential inside because I was given such a first name. How humbling that a new acquaintance could have that level of appreciation.

Recognition of the significance of people and their feelings:

Last weekend, we traveled a distance to gather for a family wedding. The joy of the occasion was not enough to overlook a fast moving virus which was attacking my youngest child. I had no choice but to go back to the hotel and give her rest. Her fever soared, her stomach pained and she collapsed in bed. She expelled every ounce of food from her frail body. In her weakness she relied fully on me to ‘make it all better’. I sat on the floor, stroking her hair waiting for her to fall asleep. The tears began to softly fall down her cheek; there was something she wanted to say. The words pierced my heart as would any mother who had spent the last 12 years in sheer devotion to her child who had overcome so much sickness. Her lips quivered as she said “Daddy promised to dance with me at the wedding dance.” I knew how much this meant to her and I too began to sob. So many emotions came forward – but the thing that overshadowed all the grief at that point was my appreciation for her sweet sensitive heart. How grateful I was to be learning from an innocent child: how to appreciate the significance of people.

What quality, value, significance or magnitude do you appreciate in people or things?

Today is a new day…may you find appreciation for everyone and everything around you.

What Are You Waiting For...

2010-06-21T08:02:00.000-05:00

Do you know someone or have you met someone and thought to yourself ‘They have so much potential inside. They really could be doing more with their life.’ The great Nelson Mandela said, “There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." The truth is, any one of us could look around and find that there are many people ‘playing small’.

In thinking about our inner potential, I will pose a question to you: What if each person decided to go after the one thing that burns them up inside; that one passion they have dreamed about all their life; that one thing that puts a smile on their face; that one thing above all things, which makes them feel free? Here’s my question for you:

What are you waiting for?

Are you waiting for the fear of failing to dissipate? Are you waiting for the insecurities to melt? Are you waiting for all the traffic lights to turn green? The amazing performance coach Kurek Ashley says: “When you work on and build your success muscles every day, you get stronger and more able to achieve your grandest of goals." Finding success in anything in life takes small consistent efforts each day - It’s an every day event.

Here are my personal words of wisdom for you today: I encourage you to take a bit of time to find what it is that you are using for an excuse to hold you back – then go after your passion despite that obstacle you see in your head. When you do, you will find that life has so much waiting for you. Do you realize that there are:

Planes to fly - Mountains to climb - Pictures to take - People to meet - Restaurants to enjoy - Water to sail - Books to write - Canvases to be painted - Cars to drive - Museums to experience - Sunsets to appreciate – Planes to jump out of – Friends to make – Languages to learn – Mountains to ski – Families to love – Children to raise – Music to sing – Dances to dance - Laughter to express and Joy to be felt.

It’s all out there. Find your inner potential...your passion.

What are you waiting for?

____________________________________
P.S. Here’s something new and a simple request from you.

If you like this post, or know someone who might benefit from the reading, please pass it along. You can easily do so via Twitter or Facebook - finding those links to the right.
If you use eMail, consider sending this to a friend.
If you agree, disagree, have something to say about this post, or simply would like to add to the list we began, please share a comment below.

15 Plus One - Another Day...

2010-06-15T12:01:00.000-05:00

Today is a new day which gives us another reason to smile. If you are looking for something to help get the corners of your mouth to turn upward toward the sky, here are more little expressions to help you…15 new thoughts (plus my personal favorite) for another day. Remember, I did swipe these off my coffee cup, but they are still good. :-)

1) Be the first to enter and the last to leave the dance floor.

2) Indulge in chocolate therapy.

3) Plant lots of trees.

4) Spin the globe then pack your bags.

5) Dare to adventure.

6) Marshmallows have no nutritional value, and that’s ok.

7) Only look back if it makes you smile.

8) Step 1: Rake leaves – Step 2: Jump!

9) You’ll only be your current age once.

10) Dance in the rain.

11) Donate blood – you have plenty.

12) Sing out loud.

13) Spend time with your kids; tomorrow they’re a day older.

14) Have a favorite charity.

15) Be the first to apologize.
.

And PLUS ONE (my personal fav)…

Learn to say thank you in ten languages.

15 PLUS ONE...

2010-06-09T16:39:00.000-05:00

Some days the clouds may hide the sunshine or we have spent our day focused on computer, leaving us a bit disoriented, cross-eyed or weary. Today I'm offering some short 'pick-me-up' phrases that can help you refocus. Okay- so I swiped them from my coffee cup, but they are still good. :)

15 PLUS ONE

~Expressions To Help You Smile~

1) Eat when you are hungry – nap when you are tired.

2) Make time for silly.

3) Make today special.

4) Laugh so hard you cry.

5) Follow your heart.

6) Smile first – ask questions later.

7) Dance to your own rhythm.

8) Continue more conversations offline.

9) Listen 1st - Talk 2nd.

10) Learn to dance a jig.

11) Start right now.

12) Thank a teacher.

13) Grow older without ever growing up.

14) Do it for love, not profit.

15) Compliment a stranger.

And PLUS ONE...

(my personal fav)

Be a hero minus the dorky cape.

Take Care of the Troops...

2010-05-31T22:59:00.000-05:00

Last week the Get Motivated! business seminar rolled through the city in which I live. The attractive line-up of successful speakers drew me to the event and it did not disappoint. It was an opportunity to be coached by some very dynamic achievers who shared their sensational wisdom on both a professional and personal level.

One speaker that took the stage by storm with his leadership message was General Colin Powell – who after years of distinguished military service, served as both the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff under United States President Clinton and Secretary of State for United States President George W. Bush. The crowd expected a point-blank message yet General Powell gave so much more. He showed his courageous leadership through military experiences, but also gave insight to his family. With humor and a huge smile, he shared a story about his grandson encouraging grandpa to learn to text and use Facebook.

We learned of how General Powell interacted with famous dignitaries as well as immigrant hot dog vendors all in the same day – showing us that the role of the leader in an organization is to convey the mission with a passion. He reminded everyone that the best leaders get everyone vibrating with the purpose. When the leader can effectively communicate, with each person on the team, their individual purpose, that is when the organization will succeed. People are looking for leaders who will ‘take care of the troops’. The only thing heard in the arena at this point was the sound of pens and pencils hitting note paper.

General Powell solidified his message of leaders ‘taking care of the troops’ with a rather simplistic example. It seems the power of a small, plain white 3X5 note card may be understated. This legendary soldier-statesman believes that people need to know they are appreciated – no matter what their role on the team may be. He shared an impactful story of how he one day removed an inexpensive note card out of his pocket, wrote a brief note of appreciation and ‘glad you are on the team’ sentiment and placed the card where a quiet unassuming team member, whom the General had little contact with, could find it. After much time had passed, General Powell found himself in this young man’s house for whatever reason. There on the wall, was the 3x5 note card exquisitely framed and delicately mounted.

The words of the General Colin Powell resonated through the arena:

10 seconds of my time and 2 cents from my wallet equaled a $150 framed memory for one young man.

Let people know they are appreciated. Let them know you are glad they are a part of the team. People are looking for leaders who will ‘take care of the troops’.

Hope Will Not Be Extinguished...

2010-05-20T22:59:00.000-05:00

It was 40 days ago we stood at the cemetery, April wind blowing through our hair, gathered around the casket of a family member. The heels on my sandals sank into the saturated grass, dowsed with a heavy rain the night before. My teenage daughter and I stood with linked arms supporting each other through our grief and tears. A Lieutenant Colonel of the United States Army in full military uniform stood to attention ready to address the quiet mourners. He removed from his pocket, a single white sheet of paper. With shaking hands and legs and a quiver in his voice, he delivered a passionate and heartfelt story recounting the numerous times he was impacted by the man we were burying. This soldier was not family by blood but by choice – choosing to honor our heroic family member with the title “dad”. This decorated officer, who committed his life to serve a purpose greater than himself, struggled to speak each word, choking back the tears while he stood alone in front of the crowd. For 20 minutes we listened to a courageous leader share nugget after nugget of extraordinary wisdom – he touched the hearts of everyone in attendance.

Sorrow shows up without invitation...but it cannot extinguish hope.

The sorrow was still with us, but we saw a new hope in this soldier’s words. He was evidence of a life that was changed because one man took the time to mentor and share his wisdom with another. We stood taller and felt proud to be part of such a giving family.

Now just 40 days after that unforgettable event, we are mourning the death of the Lieutenant Colonel who was killed during duty in Afghanistan by a suicide bomber.

Sorrow shows up without invitation…but it cannot extinguish hope.

Today our hearts are filled with even deeper sorrow. It seems to take more courage than before to find hope in this horrific circumstance. Twenty-four hours have passed since this news shook my world. I now have begun to rise up and choose to look for the hope – a choice everyone has to make on their own.

Just a few months ago, I began a new venture called The Wisdom Project. I’ve spent all my time and efforts gathering stories of Wisdom, for a book, from women around the world. The foundation of this project lies in the hope that when one person shares their wisdom – another person is strengthened. This is the hope I wish to give to others to encourage and inspire generations. This is the hope I want to pass on.

All this sorrow came into my life without an invitation, but the hope will not be extinguished. It will live on through The Wisdom Project.

For questions about The Wisdom Project go to:
http://www.thewisdomproject.info/

To submit a story, please send an email to:
yourstory@thewisdomproject.info

9 Seconds...That's All We Have...

2010-05-14T00:36:00.000-05:00

9 seconds…that’s all we have. Just 9 seconds. I just finished reading a blog from Sally Hogshead ...the average attention span of people today is 9 seconds. That certainly explains a few things!

That explains why the little 4 year old girl in front of me in church was on the chair, off the chair, on the chair and off the chair again – her 9 seconds was over. It explains why my 12 year old daughter was frustrated because she could not focus on her homework anymore at 10 p.m. – her 9 seconds was over. And it explains why I have started and stopped writing this blog post three times – my 9 seconds expired.

Okay, all kidding aside, does that statistic startle anyone? Truthfully, if we think about all the technology that we have at our fingertips today, this statistic makes quite a bit of sense! We live in a microwave society. We want everything now…well…there ARE times when I actually would like somethings done so fast I wish it was done yesterday. (But that is another story) Admit it, we hate to wait. I have said many times, we no longer go find the news and happenings from around the world; they find us. With the internet, that can happen. You know what is really annoying, is when you are holding your laptop on your lap while eating a cracker and the crumbs fall on the mouse pad. That is really annoying…oh wait…where was I? I think my 9 seconds just expired.

See how quickly that can happen? Yes, that was a shameless example to make my point, but it actually did happen, so that is worth something, right?

So now you are asking, how can we change this statistic of a 9 second attention span? Might I suggest that we ask a different question? Since the task of increasing our attention span seems quite daunting, how about if we:

understand that we live in the Information Age
realize that technology keeps changing, growing and making us better
recognize that the speed and efficiency of our media continually increases
accept the fact that we have an attention span of 9 seconds
stop fighting it and start working with the statistic

Some ways to work with our reality:

Realize I may need to prep my kid before church to help her understand that she needs to ‘chill out’ for bit while in church and THEN get to release her energy by playing outside AFTER (or if all else fails, just suck it up as the parent for the time being because they will grow out of this stage)
Know that my kid may need to do a little homework, take a break and play and then go back and do more homework later
Accept that I may not finish writing my blog post all in one sitting – life sometimes intervenes and that is okay – especially if it is my family, because I know that I will eventually finish the post

As I leave you to ponder on these thoughts, I want to share a terrific quote I read on Michael Hyatt’s blog (the CEO to Thomas Nelson Publishing) from P. J. O’Rourke on how easy it is to get distracted when you are writing:

“Usually, writers will do anything to avoid writing. For instance, the previous sentence was written at one o’clock this afternoon. It is now a quarter to four. I have spent the past two hours and forty-five minutes sorting my neckties by width, looking up the word “paisley” in three dictionaries, attempting to find the town of that name on The New York Times Atlas of the World map of Scotland, sorting my reference books by width, trying to get the bookcase to stop wobbling by stuffing a matchbook cover under its corner, dialing the telephone number on the matchbook cover to see if I should take computer courses at night, looking at the computer ads in the newspaper and deciding to buy a computer because writing seems to be so difficult on my old Remington, reading an interesting article on sorghum farming in Uruguay that was in the newspaper next to the computer ads, cutting that and other interesting articles out of the newspaper, sorting—by width—all the interesting articles I’ve cut out of newspapers recently, fastening them neatly together with paper clips and making a very attractive paper clip necklace and bracelet set, which I will present to my girlfriend as soon as she comes home from the three-hour low-impact aerobic workout that I made her go to so I could have some time alone to write.”

9 seconds…that’s all we have. Just 9 seconds.

Happy Mother's Day moms...

2010-05-07T11:38:00.000-05:00

MOTHERS

Real Mothers don't eat quiche;
They don't have time to make it.

Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils
Are probably in the sandbox.

Real Mothers often have sticky floors,
Filthy ovens and happy kids.

Real Mothers know that dried play dough
Doesn't come out of carpets.

Real Mothers don't want to know what
The vacuum just sucked up....

Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'
And get their answer when a little voice says, 'Because I love you best..'

Real Mothers know that a child's growth
Is not measured by height or years or grade...

It is marked by the progression of Mommy to Mom to Mother........

Nine Tenths of Education...

2010-05-05T01:21:00.000-05:00

"Nine tenths of education is encouragement." ~Anatole France

Dictionary.com states ENCOURAGE is “to inspire with hope or confidence; cheer; brighten”

How good does it feel when someone encourages you? Do you enjoy receiving a compliment? Have you ever gotten that warm fuzzy feeling inside when a friend sent you a cheery note via snail mail instead of a text or email? What about when someone did something nice that you did not expect?

Encouragement has the ability to breathe new life into ones soul. It can sustain hope. It can be a catalyst that pushes a person one step further. It seems that encouraging others can be as simple as lighting a candle and watching how powerfully a single flame can light a dark room.

This week my youngest daughter met her deadline and completed her school Science Fair project – something she had been working on for the last eight weeks. In preparation for the judging, she made some note cards to help her stay on track. The stresses of this event coupled with many nights of homework, sporting activities, singing performances and just an overall busy schedule, left my child over-tired…and it showed. The ‘melt down’ happened during the note card process…at the end of the day. A mental block occurred and it was quite evident.

From my perspective, the emotional outburst seemed to be over something rather trivial. It was at that moment that my own words of wisdom popped into my head:

You never know what someone is going through until you walk a mile in their shoes.

I’ve said this to my kids many times. Now the tables were turned. I do not have the same behavior patterns as my daughter, nor do I remember what it is like to be 12 years old, presenting a science project for three adult judges. The reality is I’m not walking in her shoes right now, so I really don’t know what is going through her head and heart. However, there is one thing that I CAN do:

ENCOURAGE

For this particular scenario, encouragement could be a smile, a hug, a cheery word or even a little note in her lunch box. How simple is that? And how powerful! Remember:

You never know what someone is going through until you walk a mile in their shoes.

Make today the day you chose to encourage. What kind of powerful results did you see?

Relationships First Business Second...

2010-04-20T22:01:00.000-05:00

Two or three days a week my morning begins with a workout after the car pool duties have been completed. Many days, as most moms’ can relate to, there are a series of errands that need to be completed, such as bank deposit, stamps from the post office, groceries, etc. Today was nothing unusual. A package with a prepaid label had to be delivered to The UPS Store (I refer to them as ‘Brown’). Behind the counter, the energetic young man with great eyeglass frames and adorable balding head asked how he could help me. I smiled politely and greeted him with a hearty hello. The box that held my fragile item was a bit unassuming and needed some attention. We had used all the packaging tape we owned and came up a bit short in completing the task.

Here is the part of the story I really want you to catch….

Rather than approaching the ‘Brown’ employee swiftly with a rapid-fire list of tasks that he should do for me, I chose a different path. I engaged him in conversation.

I began with a line, something like, “Looks like you must be in charge here.” His eyes lit up and we were immediately off to a good start. A few more sentences were exchanged and then he offered to help me with my humble little mailing. That point was the first I mentioned needing to mail this package AND that additional tape was needed to secure the package. (I was fully prepared to purchase a roll of packing tape and finish off the job on my own)

Here’s what happened next…

The ‘Brown’ employee said, “Since you are so genuine and pleasant I would love to finish taping that box for you and get it on its way.”

I don’t know about you, but I haven’t heard the word genuine much lately - made me feel good because I was merely just being “me”. I had no ulterior motive – I believe that it is a whole lot easier to be happy and pleasant than sad and disgruntled. In reply I blurted out…”Relationships First Business Second.” It seems more important than ever in today’s high-tech world, that we remember the relationship. The ‘Brown’ employee and I continued our conversation and I was introduced to the other ‘Brown’ employee as well. We laughed and joked around for at least another 5 minutes.

My wisdom for you today…

Whatever we are doing in life…building a business, raising a family, working our job, mailing a package…it is important to remember:

Relationships First Business Second

It seems that most solid businesses are successful because they made relationships a priority over everything else. Now it’s your turn. Go out and give away a smile, offer a hearty hello, and notice the person on the other side of the counter. That is a true win-win in life.

What's Your Story?

2010-04-14T01:04:00.000-05:00

It was Monday afternoon, the day after Easter. A call to customer service to deal with a cell phone challenge, kept me on the line longer than anticipated – I miss two calls from my husband. Later when we did connect, he relayed some startling news – his uncle had just been killed in a car accident. That icy chill traveled quickly from the base of my neck, down my back and through the back of my legs. I found my way to the floor to sit in attempt to absorb the shock.

This was the uncle who was an entrepreneur, who preferred to call his own shots, who took pride in going after what he wanted and built a financially secure future for himself, his children and his grandchildren. He and his wife were never content sitting at home – they traveled the world and experienced many cultures and people. When he shook your hand, it was always a firm handshake and he looked you straight in the eye. An outsider would say, he “led the good life”. I would say, he was determined, decisive, hard working and believed in himself – he led by example.

Over the last 20 years, I saw this man only on occasion, but I looked forward to each encounter. My favorite thing to do, when in his presence, was to just sit quietly and listen to him tell stories. Boy, did he have some tales. Sometimes it was a funny story of some people they encountered on a cruise ship or a quirky question he was asked by a business client. Sometimes it was one of those pride-filled stories of time spent with a granddaughter. Yet other times, he spoke of the scenic wonders he experienced with his eyes while touring an exotic land. With a grin on my face, I wondered, if time permitted, could he continue entertaining forever?

Today the family is faced with the reality that there will be no more stories. Those precious stories were filled with golden nuggets of wisdom which the listener could gain an education. Those precious stories not only entertained me but opened my eyes to a new perspective – a bigger world. I cherish the moments I was afforded to spend with this man. Today, the thought that crushes my spirit is realizing that the opportunity to glean the golden nuggets of wisdom from the experiences of this man…are gone. Now I must face the fact that his wisdom will go to the grave with him.

This tragedy has given me a new perspective for the project I am working on. The Wisdom Project (http://www.thewisdomproject.info/) was birthed with the belief that each time one person shares their wisdom – another person is strengthened. One of the best ways to share that wisdom is to put our thoughts/ideas/experiences to paper and share them in book form to reach people across the world. That is just what The Wisdom Project has committed to do – collect your stories of wisdom and pass them on.

No one knows how many days they have left to live. Yet while we are here, we have the opportunity, if we choose, to take a few moments and write down some words of wisdom. How many days do you have left to share your wisdom – to pass it onto the next generation? I encourage you to take the time to write what wisdom means to you and submit it to yourstory@thewisdomproject.info so your legacy can carry on.

What's your story?

Someone out there is waiting to hear it!

What Are YOU Looking At?

2010-04-05T10:30:00.000-05:00

Some may interpret an amount of bitterness in that question. However, there IS another way to read that question. My intention was merely to find out what you are looking at - what are you focused on? Where is your energy and thoughts pointed today?

Many years ago, a well respected mentor taught me a lesson on focus that has left a profound impact on my life. After all these years, her words ring in my head again today. She said:

What you focus on will expand.

Simple statement, wouldn’t you agree? When thinking of real life examples of focal points, the message can paint a vibrant mental picture. Think on this:

   • If you focus on food – your waistline can expand.
   • If you focus on exercise – your health can improve.
   • If you focus on your homework – your grades can get better.
   • If you focus on skipping school – your detention can increase.
   • If you focus on ways to bring your family together – your relationships can be enriched.
   • If you focus on your communication skills – you can become more confident

My challenge to you today is to find what you want to expand in your life. Are you focused on the right area? If we continue to focus on the caterpillar, we could easily be blinded by the overwhelming vision of death, loss and ending. But if we are focused on looking for the beautiful new fluttering butterfly on its way, we fill our mind with life, victory and a new sense of beginning. What are YOU looking at?

What you focus on will expand.

Simple Things that Make You Smile (Part II)...

2010-03-26T10:45:00.000-05:00

Last November, one of my blogs (http://bit.ly/bHSK9U) challenged you to list some simple things in life that put a smile on your face. I gave several examples of my own to help others stimulate thoughts of happiness in their life.

As the month of March comes to a close, I recognize that it was a time filled with great emotions on both sides of the spectrum – from sheer elation and exhilaration all the way to hurt, fear and frustration with many other emotions in between. I’ve dealt with challenges out of my control, like my luggage taking a holiday across the United States while I spent a holiday in Australia. (I’ll write about that experience some day later) I’ve received news from dear friends about personal health challenges they were facing and others who watched their closest loved ones fight a hard fought battle. Most recently, our neighborhood learned of a pedophile living nearby who committed yet another offense. Finally, without fail, all I have to do is turn on the television and watch the news, if I want to listen to heated arguments where two opposing groups of people verbally bash each other because the hurt and fear inside has erupted.

With all that pain, hurt and sorrow, how can anyone find a reason to smile? In a moment of reflection, I immediately thought of a favorite saying:

“It’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do before it, during it and after it.”

Today I choose to dance in the rain. Today I choose to accept that this world is not perfect and free from hurt…and neither am I. Today I choose to find the things in life that make me smile, no matter how big or small they are. Today I encourage you to choose the same.

Moving Your Communication from Good to Great...

2010-03-18T16:25:00.000-05:00

This week, I have found myself using the same phrase several times over. It goes something like this:

If you want to move from good to great…it’s the little things that will get you there.

Today while talking with a colleague about their website, I used this phrase. They made some really nice changes to their website and it looks good. I know this company well and know the message they want to communicate. When I noticed a few “little things” they could improve on, I asked if they would like to ramp things up and have a great website – because it’s the little things that will get them there.

Another area this phrase came into play was with the grade school speech team I coach. These are students in grades 5-8 who look to me to help them with some basic public speaking skills to gain poise and confidence. Not an easy thing to do. Quite frankly most people feel that public speaking is one of their greatest fears.

Experience has shown me that there is a group of students that bring some natural abilities to the table and have a determined attitude that propels them forward faster than others. This week, for those students just mentioned, I asked them if they would like to move from good to great. Of course everyone gave an enthusiastic ‘Yes’.

The question remains…How can we move our communication from Good to Great? Here are some “little things” for you to ponder on:

Pausing for Effect – when a student is delivering a serious story or poem, a good pause has the ability to grab the attention of the audience and keep them interested. Sometimes we too have to pause, take a step back and find out what we really want (or how we want our website to look). Keep in mind that you may not always be able to recognize the process on your own – having a person who is outside the forest can give you new perspective. They can see the ‘little things’ that will help you communicate more effectively.
Vocal Flexibility – An audience much prefers a speaker to have flexibility in their voice rather than a monotone nature. It is more pleasant to the ear and makes it easier to understand the information given. Again, in life, we can move from Good to Great communication when we learn to say things in a couple different ways until the message is understood.
Timing – A speech team has minimums and maximums in regard to the clock. The goal is to have the student speak long enough to see what they have learned. However, being respectful of other people’s time and not misuse their platform by taking too long is just as important. When communicating, it is always good to remember that we have one mouth and two ears - Using them in that proportion works best.

We communicate with people constantly all day long. Since it is a skill that is used so frequently, I’m suggesting that we be aware of how well we communicate. The good news?

If you want to move from good to great…it’s the little things that will get you there.

What are some ‘little things’ that you have learned to improve communication?

What's On Your Life Plate?

2010-03-09T23:13:00.000-06:00

Today while conversing with a friend, I asked her what was on her ‘Life Plate’. I actually have never used that term, nor have I heard anyone else use the reference. However, an immediate visual came to my mind. I pictured a large silver platter with hand carved swirled etch marks and grandiose edges which glistened in the light – something on which you would serve a fine meal to the people you love the most. On that platter, was each individual item that makes up my life – my spouse, children, friends, family, my home, volunteer work, house work, business and even my dreams and goals.

The reason for using that term ‘Life Plate’ has no explanation, but the visual certainly stays clear. There are days that my ‘Life Plate’ looks completely full and then someone will ask me to lead or facilitate their group, help out with this “short little project” or a family member finds themselves in the hospital. An immediate feeling of heaviness comes over me like a black cloud. Can anyone relate?

Have you asked any of these questions?

What do I do when my ‘Life Plate’ is completely full and things are leaning over the edge threatening to fall?

How can I possibly catch the falling items when I only have two hands?

Why am I continually asked to keep adding to my ‘Life Plate’ when I see no space available?

The overwhelmed feelings come when we fail to recognize what is on our ‘Life Plate’.

Might I suggest we look at things from a new perspective? Try these steps for more peace:

1-Take inventory – Specifically list each item on your ‘Plate’.

2- Rank the importance – Which items are most important to you personally? Of course I’m not willing to push my children off my plate (so to speak) so I can make room for watching my favorite weekly television show for example. It is of my opinion that my teenager needs me more now than when she was a toddler. The challenges she faces now are vital life lessons she is learning and seem to outweigh the importance of being able to tie a shoe or put a shirt on correctly. (But that’s a whole other blog)

3 -Celebrate the joy – Keep the items on your ‘Life Plate’ that bring you joy. What about the house work? Yes, put it in perspective…the joy is in being proud of a clean house. Order does produce peace. Just trust me on this one.

Where is your focus? Sometimes life does seem ‘full’. Realize if you continue to look at the lack of space you cannot relieve the darkness. I encourage you to place your focus on the amount of joy each item can bring to you. Go ahead – give it a try today. You’ll be glad you did.

Take Charge of Your Happiness...

2010-02-10T21:55:00.001-06:00

Sitting in a conference one day, I caught an alarming statistic:

Adults smile 15 times a day while
children smile 400 times a day.

What a stark contrast that is. We can come up with all kinds of reasons…or can I call them excuses…that adults would choose to smile less. Yet, if I am truthful with you, I would tell you that

No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

In thinking about how to help people take charge of their own happiness, I thought I would share a few simple but profound points from an email I received from a friend and colleague. I’ve added some personal observations as well. Forgive me if you have read this before, but for those of you that haven’t, I encourage you to take some time to ponder.

1) Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Those numbers don’t tell the real story.

2) Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3) Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop & dull living’. Experience new things...get out.

4) Enjoy the simple things. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful. Stop to smell the flowers. Get up to see the sun rise. Listen to a child giggle.

5) Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath...

6) The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive. Life isn’t fair but it’s still good.

7) Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8) Cherish your health. If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9) Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country if you must, but NOT to where the guilt is. No matter how you feel…get up, dress up and show up.

10) Tell the people you love that you love them…at every opportunity.

You’ve heard it said before…life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away. What’s keeping you from smiling more and taking charge of your happiness? Start today by embracing one of the above suggestions and see if you feel better. Take charge of your happiness. Let me see you smile!

Do You Need a Jumpstart?

2010-02-01T11:45:00.000-06:00

The frigid temps outside made me wonder if my car would start the other morning. My vehicle usually does not sit outside overnight but that night I stayed at a hotel. As I walked out to my car the next morning, I notice the vacant lot; most everyone had checked out. While holding my breath, I turned the ignition key. The engine hesitated, groaned and then ever so slowly came to life. I breathed a sigh of relief because I was not prepared for an event requiring jumper cables. Truthfully, even if I had jumper cables with me, I would still need assistance. Our AAA auto club membership roadside assistance would have served as a good backup plan. Although my experience went smoothly I learned something valuable. Think about this:

When we need a jumpstart in life, it requires assistance.

Jump starting my vehicle would require the help of another person regardless if it is the Auto Club or another hotel patron offering his vehicle…and a set of jumper cables in my case. The point is that there was no way possible I could get my van running by myself, no matter how great my efforts or determination. Bottom line…I needed help.

So why do we expect that we will be able to ‘jump-start’ our life by our self? Back in college I struggled with being overweight. I hit my all time high and made a decision that I needed to change some things. It did not take more than a couple days to realize that I needed someone to help me jump-start my endeavor. A dear friend chose to workout with me; she pushed me when the going got rough. Since I am a horrible morning person, I needed her to kick me in the seat of the pants and get me moving. Because I asked for help and she willingly stepped up, I lost 50 pounds and have kept it off for more than twenty years.

In what area do you need to ask for help to jump-start things?

Do you need to ask a good friend or personal trainer to exercise with you?

Do you need to ask a trusted person for feedback on a new logo you are creating for your business?

Do you need to ask your current customers for referrals?

Do you need to ask someone you admire to mentor you?

There most likely is something that you want to accomplish and know you could use a jump-start. The first step is to ask for help.

When we need a jumpstart in life, it requires assistance.

“You create your opportunities by asking for them.” ~ Shakti Gawain

Stop Settling and Start Living...

2010-01-19T12:42:00.001-06:00

It was a dreary, overcast morning; the kind that make it hard to get out of bed and get started on your day. A few upbeat songs came on the radio that cleared my head and got me in the right frame of mind to get my workout completed. While at the club, a woman who was working out next to me, started sharing with the trainer that she had some changes going on in her life. Her husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s at the age of 62 and now he moved to a care facility at 70 years of age because his mind was gone. She was trying desperately to keep going and remain positive, but the reality of the experience was staring her straight in the face demanding to be noticed.

Many thoughts raced through my mind about this man’s young age, how short life is and how we just don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Yet more than anything, I just wanted to know…did he make the most of every day before the Alzheimer’s stole his life? Did he make his work a priority or did he laugh with his family and create memories with them? Did he talk about where he would go ‘someday’ or did he travel and experience the incredible world we live in? Did he settle for mediocrity or did he embrace all that life has to offer? Did he take things for granted or did he tell the people who meant the most to him that he loved them?

“There are many things in life that will catch our eye but only a few will catch your heart…pursue those.”

No one can predict how much time we have left to live our life. If there is something tugging at your heartstrings that you have been putting off, why not pursue it. Even if life has thrown you a string of curve balls trying to strike you out, why not pick today to stand back up, brush yourself off and try again. Make a plan, talk to someone, pay attention to the things other people do that you find fascinating and start experiencing all those things you’ve wanted to do but never have.

“Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.”

Make today the day you stop settling and start living.

Play to Win...

2010-01-04T11:14:00.001-06:00

The Gator Bowl, the Sugar Bowl, the Cotton Bowl, and the “Granddaddy of them All”…the Rose Bowl have entertained millions of college football fans across the nation during this New Year’s holiday. My family, like others have spent hours watching these talented teams bring their very best skills (along with some verbal outbursts) to compete for the title ‘winner’.

Winning on the field and winning in life, I’ve noticed while watching college football bowl games, have some similarities. Here are three that jumped out at me, see if you agree.

     A) Some teams have more depth. They have more players to play the game and keep everyone fresh and alert. Additionally, with more depth on your team, you can play each player in their strongest area. When each player exercises their strength, the team becomes stronger and at times…undefeatable.

     B) Some teams are just more prepared. The game we watch on television is the culmination of days, weeks and months of hard work, training, sweat and practice. The viewer does not see all the dedication behinds the scenes. Yet it is certain that there are many different levels of preparation. It stands to reason that those who spend more time in the weight room will be stronger. Those who spend more time with the trainer will be more coordinated. Those who spend more time exercising will be healthier. Hence, the team that is more prepared should be able to win more games.

     C) Some teams just want to win more. The will to win is an amazing factor seemingly giving teams momentum. As a sports fan, I’ve seen two teams walk onto their playing field with two very different swaggers. One team with head and chest held high, the other head and shoulders sagging. The difference? I might suggest the difference could be belief. One team just wants to win and believes they will be victorious. The other team…well, to be honest, they hope they will win.

It’s a new year. Are you ready to become a better, stronger, more winning team? Where are the specific areas you need to strengthen?

Do you need more depth on your team? Take a look at the strength of each player. Are they playing to their strong suit?
Do you need to be more prepared? What specific area needs improvement - education, motivation, organization, attitude?
Do you want to win? Do you believe?

If college football teams are willing to ‘lay it on the line’ for a trophy and a t-shirt, what are you willing to do to win in your life? There is no better time to start than today, because today is the first day of the rest of your life. Play to win.

2009-12-24T13:33:00.000-06:00

Wishing you a blessed Christmas and a New Year filled with
health, happiness and prosperity.

How to Help the World, One Person at a Time...

2009-12-07T22:29:00.001-06:00

A few years ago, there was a day that my oldest daughter needed a ride to an event. On the way, she asked if we could stop to get a sandwich so we pulled into a nearby sandwich shop. I followed my daughter in because someone had to pay the bill and of course teenagers never have any money! Once the sandwich was made very young, dark haired girl moved gently to the cash register. Her methodical quiet pace revealed her to have a slightly reserved personality. Without making eye contact, she gave me the total cost in a slight whisper. I in turn, fumbled for my pink wallet amongst the vast array of crinkled receipts in my purse. (Where do they all come from?) As I looked up into the youthful employees face, I noticed that she was wearing adorable eye glass frames which complimented her personal beauty. Without hesitation, I blurted out, “Wow. You have really great eye glass frames. I love how they look on you. They are a perfect fit for your face.”

What happened next is the part of the story I really want you to catch. This reserved, bashful girl raised her torso, lifted her chin, and got a big smile across her face. She looked me straight in the eye and said, “Thank you!”

My daughter and I left the sandwich shop and drove off to her event. Yet, I just could not release from my mind, the vision of that young girls reaction back at the store. All I did was share an honest, heartfelt compliment. Yet it seemed to turn her world around. By watching her body language, it was as if her self-confidence increased. The quick compliment sure made her smile. All I could think about was the amazing transformation that happened to an individual, just because I chose to give a compliment.

Since that time, I’ve often wondered, why don’t people give more compliments?

Here are three reasons I came up with – see if you agree.

1) Possibly it is a TIME issue. After all, we are busy people. You and I are time pressed. We live in a microwave society where we like things to happen instantaneously. Yep, that’s it. People probably don’t give more compliments because it takes too much time. Well, the compliment I gave to the employee must have taken me about 20 seconds – maybe less. If you and I talked about it, I bet we would agree that giving a compliment and making someone feel great actually doesn’t take much time at all. It is something we all can do while we are ‘doing’ life. So if it is not a time issue that people don’t give more compliments, what is it?

2) Maybe it’s FINANCIAL - People are constantly talking about their shortage of money, fuel prices, foreclosures on homes, and the overall mess that the economy is in. Maybe people don’t give more compliments because it costs too much money. Let’s think about it for a second. How much did it cost me to say a few nice words to this young girl? I think we can all concur that this compliment withdrew nothing from my wallet. The sandwich still was the same price. So if it is not because of finances that people don’t compliment more, what is it?

3) This time I think I’ve got it. It must be EFFORT. Sure, there it is; it takes too much effort for us to compliment someone else. Well, I don’t know. Maybe it wasn’t all that hard. I can tell you one thing, I was NOT in the parking lot outside of that sandwich shop giving myself a pep talk and doing cardio vascular exercises in preparation for a big event inside the restaurant. No way. My teenage daughter would have disowned me as her mom! Truth is, it took zero effort on my part to pass along a deserving compliment that day.

So if it takes very little time, no money and the smallest of effort, why don’t people give more compliments?

Might I offer a suggestion? Could it possibly be that we are so caught up in ourselves and our daily happenings, that we are forgetting to look at who is across the counter from us? Maybe?

Helen Keller was such an incredible person, overcoming huge challenges in her lifetime. She said, “To the world you may be just one. But to one, you may be the world.” Now go back and read that again. Chances are that you thought of a very special person that did or said something to you that changed your world. Remember how it elevated you? Remember how gushy you felt inside? Did you smile or was a full-fledged beam from ear to ear? How else did it impact you? Is that a feeling that should be felt by more people?

I encourage you to pay that feeling forward to someone else. What better season to say something nice to another. Just think what would happen if you and I started a complimenting revolution? We could together make an impact that would reverberate across the land. How awesome it would be to see a changed world. Go ahead start today. What are you waiting for? Go out and make a difference in this world – give a compliment.

Simple Things that make you Smile...

2009-11-18T15:48:00.000-06:00

A former high school classmate, with just one blog post, has reminded me that life continues to go by quickly and we don’t usually take time to remember the things that make us happy. When I read his ‘personal inventory’ compilation of his simple pleasures, it inspired me to do the same. Although this list may be completely different than yours, I hope it motivates you to take some time and create your own list to reflect on and smile about. Here is mine:

• Walking into Starbucks on a Friday morning to find they still have a piece of Lemon Loaf left for you.

• Having a friend whom you have not spoken with for a long time, give you a phone call out of the blue. Even though the conversation only lasts for a few minutes, it’s the warm fuzzy you feel inside when you hear their voice.

• Feeling their elation when your child tells you about something thrilling that happened to them at school.

• Unending laughter when you are together as a family at the dinner table, over something rather random and corny, but still seems to strike a chord with at least 2 people at the table. You know…the kind that causes near hyperventilation and makes your eyes water?

• Knowing that your 16 year old thinks it’s cool to walk into Target on a Thursday night with both her and her mom wearing pink baseball hats.

• Enjoying family time at Disney World for days on end while being completely unplugged from the world…and not caring how many Emails, Texts, Tweets or Facebook messages you have missed.

• When your heart is hurting and a friend simply says, “I care about you.”

• Getting a snail mail Christmas card with a picture instead of just a card.

• The smell of freshly made popcorn…with extra butter.

• Having your spouse create a memorable tradition by preparing a lobster dinner at home for you on Valentine’s Day because it’s your Birthday…and watching the kids eat hot dogs.

• Being able to receive words of affirmation and appreciation from people because your writings have touched them in a special way.

Realizing that 75% of my list happened within 48 hours prior to writing about it, reminds me that happiness abounds all around. What are some simple things in life that make you smile? We’d love to hear them!

Walkin' in a Wonderland...

2009-11-13T11:22:00.000-06:00

Do you ever wonder at the wonder of it all? Do you watch the waves roll in and then look out far beyond them where the water seems to touch the sky and realize that the vast expanse before your eyes is only a small little corner of all there really is?

Ralph S. Marston, Jr. gave these words life in his famed poem “The Wonder of It All”. Webster defines the meaning of wonder as “a feeling of surprise, admiration and awe aroused by something strange, unexpected and incredible”.

Living in the Midwest, residents experience incredible wonder with the change of seasons. The winter months bring sparkling fresh blankets of snow and a bitter chill in the air. One can hear the screams from children sledding down a hill and see the determined efforts of the snowboarding teenagers who are challenged by the run of the course. Come spring, the soft rain showers wash away the heavy compacted snow and give way to a renewal of the land. Green plants start to arise from the earth, birds begin to sing their songs and flowers prepare to release their colorful fragrant blossoms. Summer quickly follows with temperatures skyrocketing and neighbors enjoying the aroma of burgers and brats on the grill. A child’s laughter fills the air as they swing higher than ever before and men listen for the rumble from a nearby speed boat or motorcycle. Before long, another renovation occurs as the leaves on the trees change from emerald to crimson to amber to russet. They flutter to the ground when the brisk autumn breeze blows. Whistles and cheers fill the air at the football games and a crackling of the logs in the fire pit will mesmerize all who stop to feel its warmth. Almost in the blink of an eye, the transformation has come full circle when the approaching signs of winter appear once again. Each season holds a wonder and an amazement all its own.

During the summer months, a tree can be as wide as it is tall, filled with large deep green thick leaves, so abundant that the tree trunk and branches are not visible. Yet, in the winter, that very same tree will stand the test of time, with only its bare thin trunk and peeling bark. Do you ever wonder how it will renew itself and blossom into its full beauty and potential again next year? Ah…the wonder of it all!

We each are walking in a land of wonder and amazement. I urge you to dig deep today to find the wonders around you, to stop and smell the flowers. Find what you have taken for granted. When was the last time you listened to the pitter patter of raindrops falling ever so softly? When was the last time you allowed yourself to slowly eat your favorite food, holding it in your mouth and appreciate the robust flavors it offers? When was the last time you stopped to caress the cheek of a tiny infant or stroked a velvety baby bunny? When was the last time you delighted in the smell of fresh baked cookies and thought back to years gone by?

Today is a new day of wonder. Take five minutes before turning in for the night, to journal some things in your life that you are grateful for…things that make you wonder.

Defining Moments

2009-11-08T02:18:00.001-06:00

Tonight my family and I attended a concert where a dear friend was performing. There were several very talented artists involved, but one in particular stood out. I might be a tad bit partial but nonetheless, the reason this singer/songwriter stood out to me was because he presented my youngest daughter with a precious gift. No, he didn’t share any diamonds or pearls with her, nor did he grant her a monetary gift. The present this man bestowed on her is so valuable it will last a lifetime. This complete stranger took the time to recognize an eleven year old child, look her in the eye and plant a seed in her heart with his words and message. He told her about a song he had just recorded called “Undefined”. With thoughtfulness in his eyes and passion in his heart, he told her that “Undefined” meant ‘having no definition’. He proceeded to declare that the world cannot ‘define’ who she is as a person. She is on a journey where she is defining who she is; she can define the undefined, reach for the unreachable, believe the unbelievable, and laugh at the impossible.

With tears in my eyes I stood in complete humbleness. What if everyone was willing to plant a seed of greatness in someone they have never met before? What if you and I took our eyes off ourselves long enough to reach out to a child and tell them they were special? What if we lifted one person each day with our words or message? Dare we ask what might happen?

Today’s world is in need of people, ordinary people like you and I, who are willing to define the undefined; People willing to reach out to the unreachable. People who believe that we CAN change the world…for the better…by planting one seed in one person each step of the way. Who is willing to Flip the Switch and redefine who they are by planting a seed?

It's Planting Time...

2009-10-26T22:11:00.001-05:00

Last fall, many people saw the American economy ‘down for the count’. We heard terms like downturn, recession and slump. True, America was sick, but during challenging times, poor discipline and immaturity seem to be revealed. Maybe it’s time to get real and be honest. Try this on for size….the economy is not dwindling – it’s being transformed.

We were sick and now it’s time to fix the root of the problem. Forget the band-aid. Let’s pick up the pieces and put them together in a new way to form a new life. What this situation exposed was simply all the elements that were broken.

What would happen if we embraced the chaos? What if we buried the self doubt, the doom and gloom, the envy and the ‘woe is me’ attitude? Go ahead…pick up a shovel, dig a six foot hole and bury that stuff for good. The truth is, today is a great time for a new generation to rise up and find the strength to start planting – planting confidence, determination and belief.

Think about when the gardener plants a new seed. When that seed begins to sprout, the first thing that comes up is a little dirt - it is then and only then that the shoot begins to appear. Can you hang on long enough to brush away the initial dirt so you can celebrate the new healthy green sprouting growth? That kind of determination will be needed.

The germination period for each seed is different. Some seeds sprout right away but the plant is slow to grow. While others take excessive amounts of time to push through the earth, then their bloom comes quickly. Can you maintain your confidence even when there is no sight of growth?

Think about a farmer. When he plants corn in the spring, he knows without a shadow of a doubt that he will be harvesting corn (not wheat) in the fall. He maintained his belief throughout the entire growing season. Can you sustain your belief throughout growing season?

We’re not ‘down and out’; it’s time to Plant. Planting confidence, determination and belief today has the potential to create an abundant harvest tomorrow.

Choosing Your Battles...

2009-10-01T14:09:00.002-05:00

Growing up I've heard the saying, "You have to choose your battles." I've told other mothers the very same thing. While this is great advice for parenting (especially when you have a teenager), some battles arrive with full armor ready to take charge that we did not choose.

My dear friend did not choose breast cancer and a brain aneurism...but she did choose to fight.

The battles that have chosen me this last month, I did not choose. But I know in order to survive them, I have to fight. And that I will do.

What battle has come to you? Are you willing to fight?

The world is looking for a generation of people who will rise up when the battles of life get difficult....even scary. It would be much easier to give in or give up all together.

Know that you are not alone. Know that YOU can CHOOSE to be a warrior. I will. Will YOU?

** Kimberly recommends the book "Warrior Chicks" by Holly Wagner for further insight on this subject.

If You're Happy and You Know It...

2009-09-18T21:40:00.000-05:00

Today is the day of the week that is adored by most people...today is Friday. Back in the day, it was the day where I seemed to have the most energy because I was anticipating the occurrence of fun during the weekend. Yet today, several years later, my energy level is zero and the thought of going to sleep at 8pm sounds like a fantastic idea!

What did your week look like? Mine consisted of a doctor appointment, physical therapy, two separate car pool arrangements each day, leading a Bible Study, attending a Mom’s of Teens group, a conference call, parents night at school, Skyping with colleagues in Atlanta and Australia, cheering for one kid at two different volleyball games and driving the other to work, a tweet here and a tweet there, RSVPing to a child’s birthday party, reading a self-help book to learn and grow and writing a blog. It’s no wonder that I forgot it was picture day at school on Wednesday and had to run to the mall the night before and spend exactly 42 minutes finding a cute shirt only to fly back home with the kids for them to complete homework. Newsflash for everyone...I’m TIRED!

Now, I'm not complaining because this IS the life I chose. Things could be even more crazy if I had a 40 hour a week job in addition to the above items (God bless those of you who do!). There did seem to be a theme throughout my week. Let me explain....during my social media time, I read a blog from a woman who is implementing a 3-day a week 10pm bedtime for herself because she is not getting enough sleep and it is making her cranky. Then I read an article that said studies are showing that women are less happy today than they were in 1969 even though we are achieving more than ever thought possible.

Ladies! What is going on? Are we less happy? Are we more tired? Is our calendar too full? Are we working ourselves too much?

I really don’t know the answer to these questions, but I do believe that happiness is a choice. Some will agree with that and others won’t. Either way, I’d be interested to hear what YOU do to find/maintain some level of happiness in your life. Maybe if we each shared one or two things we could accumulate a list that could reach a generation of women! What if? Let me get your think tank started:

1. Surround yourself with favorite things – I have 6 brightly coloured plastic coasters with Mickey ears all over them that we just picked up at Disney World. They remind me of our great times and make me smile.
2. Set a timer while blogging – If there is a set time with no outside distractions then I can write more efficiently and effectively. The trick is to actually set aside the time. But when I do, I feel good about my accomplishment and smile when I lay my head on the pillow at night.

Okay…now it’s your turn. Send me your thoughts. Tell me what do YOU do to find/maintain a level of happiness in your life? Together, let’s see if we can ‘turn up’ the happiness meter in the crazy lives of women.

Perseverance with a Capital "P"...

2009-09-11T20:42:00.000-05:00

I dare you to watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nifq3Ke2Q30
No, I’m not going to have you buy anything or send anything to your computer. Nor am I going to sway your political or religious beliefs. I dare you to watch this video (be sure to click the back button when you are done) and reflect on the emotion that it evokes inside of you. Go ahead…it only takes 2 ½ minutes. When you have that assignment done, then you are free to continue reading.

Ok. That was worth 2 ½ minutes of your time, wasn’t it?

That Olympic performance was perseverance with a capital “P”. Because of Derek Redmond’s sheer willpower and strength of mind, he completed that which he had started - The one thing that was his only focus for weeks prior. He persevered through extraordinary circumstances to accomplish his goal.

During the Olympics we see so many individuals stand the test of time and overcome great obstacles to earn the right to stand on a podium and watch the flag from their country raise while their national anthem is played. The thing that those athletes have in common is perseverance.

Perseverance is not only for the Olympic athlete. The woman diagnosed with breast cancer receiving chemotherapy and continuing to care for her children, has perseverance. The man who was laid off months ago and continues to seek employment after each rejection letter is received, has perseverance. The child who comes from the home where there is fighting and unhappiness, yet chooses to give their best during school has perseverance.

Perseverance comes in all shapes and sizes. What is your challenge? What are you pressing through right now? Are you in the beginning, end or somewhere in the middle? Have you had those days where you just don’t want to go on any more? Are you asking how to carry on?

A dear friend, whom I have great respect for, gave me this quote this week, “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass – it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” Derek Redmond didn’t wait for the pain to subside – he danced through the puddles in his way.

If you find yourself faced with a challenge and the road seems long and bumpy, look around you and see all the reasons to keep going. If nothing else…write these quotes upon your heart. They are sure to get you through the next hurdle:

Let your hook always be cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish. (Ovid)

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn’t know that so it goes on flying anyway. (Mary Kay Ash)

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all. (Dale Carnegie)

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins – not through strength but by perseverance. (H. Jackson Brown)

To Compliment or Not To Compliment...

2009-09-03T21:27:00.001-05:00

An email came into my inbox today that caught my immediate attention. It was from an acquaintance that I have great respect for – Kevin Eickenberry at Remarkable Leadership. It seems that he is conducting a sort of ‘test’, if you will, on Twitter with regard to giving people authentic, genuine recognition more often.

I quickly thought back to two days prior of a discussion that occurred during a training session that my husband and I were conducting for a company in Ohio. During our training session, a participant shared that he feels that leading with a compliment while meeting a new person is a good idea. I in turn added that I have gotten into the habit of giving compliments to anyone I meet regardless if they are a stranger or friend. Many times when I am out ‘doing life’ and I see a girl with a cute haircut, a guy with attractive eye frames, or someone with an outfit that looks amazing on them…I will share my compliment with them. My theory is that the world is so caught up in their own day-to-day routine that we forget to notice others around us. If a compliment is deserved, it should be given (in my opinion). Someone on the other side of the room interjected because he was opposed to that idea. He felt that complimenting an individual immediately upon meeting, comes off as phony.

So here I am today, realizing that there are once again, two sides to each issue and wondering is there a happy middle? Although I understand that Kevin Eikenberry is speaking more of verbal recognition, giving a compliment seems to have the same uplifting power for a spirit.

What has been your experience? Possibly it is good for us to practice complimenting more often, but to be sure it is genuine and authentic. Maybe we can work a bit harder to craft a compliment in a genuine heartfelt manner. The middle may be the answer or maybe we can get a consensus from a twitter test. Either way, my belief is this: A compliment is about making the other person feel good, not about feeling good about ourselves.

I encourage you to go out and give a compliment today and see what happens. Together, we could possibly change the world.

Success Principles Learned on the Golf Course...

2009-08-13T01:53:00.000-05:00

The state of Minnesota is known for its many lakes. But this week all eyes are on Hazeltine National Golf Course in Chaska, Minnesota. Competitive golfers and fans of the sport are gathering for the 91st Professional Golfers Association (PGA) Championship. With the highest amount of golfers per capita of any state in the U.S., this prestigious and rather lengthy golf course has been swarming with spectators for the last three days of practice rounds with some of the biggest names in professional sports.

Since our home is less than eight miles from this event and thanks to a very generous brother-in-law, my husband and I were able to experience this rare occurrence first-hand today. After clearing security, we entered the venue with a drove of spectators, each with their own agenda. The hustle and bustle of excited viewers was more stimulating to experience than your average morning cup of coffee. We quickly decided to head to the back nine (that’s hole numbers 10-18 for you none golfers). Hole number 16 is a signature hole for this golf course. Everyone who follows golf in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area has heard of the ‘amazing 16th hole’ at Hazeltine.

After a gorgeous nature hike through tree-lined wooded paths and scurrying over manicured, lush greens we found our destination and took a seat. The grandstands were sparse; the nearest person was more than 10 feet away. I sat speechless in awe of the magnificent view before me. The temperature was still at a comfortable 75 degrees F and rising, the sun rays beat down on my fair Minnesota skin and a warm breeze blew softly across the lake. The majestic oak trees gently swayed and a vast array of wildlife took flight from the prairie grass. This was a perfect time to appreciate all of God’s creation.

By now, you might be asking what in the world does this have to do with success in life. Well, recently I heard this stunning piece of real estate being described by some golf professionals. They used words like intimidating and difficult with a potential for dramatic change. Yes, this 16th hole did look different than the other seventeen holes, but in a good way…to the spectator, not the player.

Seemingly, this peninsula taunts players and appears to play with their minds. Both the professional and the amateur become nervous when facing this test. Yet a headline in today’s newspaper read: PGA championships: ‘Sixteen is one the best holes in America’.

Okay, let’s get this straight…in golf, intimidating and difficult with a potential for dramatic change is desirable? In fact, it is. The golfers agree that these obstacles and stumbling blocks help the best become better. It challenges men of every skill level to dig deep and find the champion within.

For those of us who earn our living outside of professional sports, these same situations arise. Many times we can become intimidated with a challenge before us. We view the task ahead as difficult with a high potential for dramatic change. We become nervous when the obstruction appears. We hear the taunting in our head.

But the good news is that those hurdles and impediments are there to show us how strong we are. When was the last time you broke through a wall in your path? Did you remove the bricks one by one with a logical, systematic approach or did you hit it head on and break through with fire and gusto? Remember how great life was on the other side? You are a stronger, better, faster person today because of a once seemingly impossible barrier in front of you.

The next four days of the PGA Championship tournament are sure to be filled with thrills and upsets and in the end, a new 2009 champion will be crowned. Let’s watch and learn and grow with these golfers, knowing success comes to those who persevere.

Are Women Going 'Back to the Basics'?

2009-08-04T17:27:00.000-05:00

There has been a great deal in the media lately about women being good leaders, strong in the business place, growing more and more confident and able to handle both work and family. Time magazine ran an article a few months back which agreed with many of these points. While waiting in the doctor’s office, I had a chance to glance at that editorial and found myself nodding in agreement, thinking ‘well of course that is true’.

In my own experience, the more I grew and accomplished as a woman, the more I wanted other women to experience the same rewarding satisfaction inside. For years, when asked what I do for a living, I have told people that I help women make a great first impression every time they walk through the door. Even though I have a tremendous amount of education and experience working with skin care, cosmetics, colour analysis and clothing personalities, I always point to some very basic things that we as women can do to grow into who we were created to be. See if you agree with any of these:

Attain a together appearance before walking out the door.
Simple things like keeping a current haircut and eye glass frames, nails filed, good personal hygiene and dressing appropriately for the work place. Taking a few extra seconds to check in the mirror before heading out for the day allows us to take our eyes off of ourselves and go out to give to others.

Sustain a good attitude.
Remember that not every day is going to go as planned, but sometimes one door closes so another can open up. People who carry a ‘woe is me’ attitude with them seem to repel others. Doesn’t it make more sense to be so upbeat that others move toward you and ask ‘what in the world are you so happy about?’

Maintain a favorable work ethic.
Knowing that there is no such thing as a free lunch in life, implies that it is going to take some effort to achieve anything worthwhile. We’ve all heard that it’s the early bird that gets the worm. Many times persistence is just as important. Remember that when our hard work sometimes is not showing the fruit we would like to bear, it’s really important to implement point B) at this time while we are pressing on to our goals.

These are three very basic points that seem to be present in any successful woman that comes to my mind (and there are a lot of them). Maybe women have found a way to eradicate the excess and get down to the basics, finding that the nuts and bolts can strengthen the foundation. Maybe we are in the process of opening our eyes to what is really important to each of us. Whatever the reason, here is something we may all agree upon…the tallest of buildings is unable to stand unless a firm foundation is in place. So let’s use those basics in our favor and soar to new heights.

C.P.R for Twenty Years of Marriage...

2009-07-28T22:47:00.000-05:00

While reading some comments on a social media site the other day, I came across a response that caught my attention. When one woman stated that she had been married for twenty years, another woman told her to blog about this accomplishment because she would have a great deal of wisdom to share with others.

In September of 2009, my husband and I will also celebrate our twentieth wedding anniversary. I, like the woman above, really don’t consider myself to have great marital advice. Yet, while pondering the diverse array of responders that day, I realized that there are a couple of things that do keep my own marriage growing.

I’m full aware that not everyone reading this blog is married, but for those who are or may be contemplating marriage, here are the three main ingredients that breathe life into our union.

C = Communication:
“Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing.” (Rollo May) Communication is listed first because this is the number one thing that changed our marriage for the better. Years ago, my husband and I like many other new parents, struggled to ‘get along’ when our children were little. Everything was new, busy and (most of the time) off-center. Sleep was a precious commodity; Tempers flared because we were both tired and had no idea what the other was thinking or doing. We realized that we needed to make our marriage a priority by communicating. Today, this is accomplished by simply taking some time once in awhile to sit on the couch (after the kids are in bed) with a glass of wine and just share whatever comes to mind. I will offer my opinion here of the two most important points for both spouses during communication:

1) Remember you BOTH get a chance to talk.

2) The word LISTEN has the same letters as the word SILENT.

P = Planning:
“There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing.” (Brian Tracy) I have to admit, it took me some time to come up with a fitting word for the letter P. However, after reading Brian Tracy’s quote, it was easy. When a husband and wife are continually planning for their future together, they are looking forward with hope and faith. This essential ingredient takes effort and participation from both sides, but the rewards surpass all. This may include planning what their family may look like five or ten years down the road, where the couple will travel and explore or it may consist of setting financial goals. Whatever the plans, this action has a way of drawing a couple closer while raising anticipation and joy.

R = Romance:
“Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.” (Anthony J. D’Angelo) Of course one of the three main ingredients for a living, breathing marriage is romance. Life will always be filled with crazy schedules and circumstances beyond our control. The real test is to continue to place in front of you, all the reasons you chose marriage in the beginning. Keeping the romance alive starts with small steps…date nights, an evening walk or bike ride together, a picnic in the park…it doesn’t have to be extravagant or cost a lot. Last week, my husband picked up a couple of lobsters from the grocery store and we ate in instead of going out. There was no birthday or holiday; we just randomly decided to do a little something extra, just the two of us, since our kids were gone for the evening.

I certainly do not claim to be an expert in relationships. Nor will I tell you that marriage is easy. But what I can share with you is real examples that have worked for my marriage for almost twenty years; Communication, planning and romance are three essential components that have resuscitated our life with hope and happiness. How about you? Have you refreshed your C.P.R. skills lately?

Lessons In Uncommon Places...

2009-07-24T18:27:00.000-05:00

My husband loves reading and has a passion for history. Just the other night he rattled off a date of some event they were talking about on television…before the reporters gave the date. Although I don’t hold the same level of interest in history, I was still in awe at how quickly the information came to him-nothing short of amazing in my mind. He reads daunting books with 300, 400 and some even 500+ pages in length, all of them about history, ones that I only will glance at on the book shelf and sigh. For me, reading something with that fine print and thickness would be like trying to run a full marathon without training. I would wonder if I would be able to finish.

There has been no book that he has talked more about than “Uncommon Friends” by James Newton. It is a (357 page) book about the lives of Thomas Edison, Henry Ford, Harvey Fire stone, Alexis Carrel and Charles Lindbergh. They are five 20th century giants known personally by very few – except for James Newton. Many know the accomplishments of these great men but Newton captures their lives on a personal level.

Since my husband spoke so highly of this book (and so frequently) I decided to open the book randomly and begin reading. I had no idea what would happen next. Not only did this author keep my attention, but he was able to colour a vivid picture of who Henry Ford was as a man. After I flew through just 10 or 12 pages of encouraging printed words, I decided to stop to share some pearls of wisdom from Henry Ford:

“The purpose of money is to provide more opportunity to perform more service. Short-sighted businessmen think first of money, but service is what really makes or breaks a business; without it, customers soon go elsewhere.”

“True happiness comes from the realization of accomplishment.”

“If money is your only hope for independence, you will never have it.”

“It’s our first duty to do the right thing, and this will earn us the right money.”

“We ought to think of our country as a servant of mankind. A trustworthy, righteous nation, whose joy is to help all people toward peace and progress. Except for idealists there would have been no United States."

These quotes contain tremendous power and wisdom. Valuable insights can be gleaned by examining the thought process of historical figures. Reading a large book on history is more of an uncommon place for me, but when I chose to go out of my comfort zone I was blessed with great wisdom to learn, grow and share. How about you? Is there an uncommon place you need to visit from which you could learn?

Real Life Fender Benders...

2009-07-21T20:25:00.000-05:00

While running errands today, a song came on the radio that has a catchy little tune and quirky words that strike home with women. I started humming along the first time I heard it and now my daughter enjoys singing along as well. Its fun, relatable message goes something like this… “Got couple dents in my fender – got a couple rips in my jeans – trying to put the pieces together, but perfection is my enemy”. This song, “Free to Be Me” is sung by a girl named Francesca Battistelli.

I had to chuckle to myself today because my 16 year old put a dent in my husbands sedan earlier this month. She was driving with her father, and while parking at the mall, she happened to hit the gas pedal instead of the brake. The car popped up over the curb and knocked over the small ‘temporary parking’ sign on a metal post in front of her. My daughter and my husband each were startled but the moment of fear caused opposite reactions to the minor event - One being silence with a frozen look on her face, the other a verbal outburst.

Some time has passed and we now giggle when we see the sign, which has once again tilted toward the ground because of the unfortunate incident. When retelling the story, friends have asked how we can now make light of this incident…typically from mom’s who have children close to the age of 16.

Here’s what I learned that can help you:

1) Find a Practical Perspective
“When you look at yourself from a universal standpoint, something inside always reminds or informs you that there are bigger and better things to worry about.” (Albert Einstein) In the overall scheme of things, this was a minor accident, but a good teaching moment. Truthfully, it gave both parties involved, a chance to learn and grow. One received education on what to do when denting dad’s car, the other was reminded not to sweat the small stuff because it’s all small stuff.
2) Have a Reasonable Expectation
“In the middle of every difficulty, lies opportunity.” (Albert Einstein) Expecting that our new driver will go through the learning curve perfectly is unrealistic. Understanding and accepting this while going through this trying time for both parent and child, allows us the freedom to become flexible. When there is room to breath, an opportunity exists for discovery, independence, wisdom and certainty to grow.
3) Say a Sensible Word
“Correction does much, but encouragement does more.” (Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe) Will there be more fender benders? Probably. Will there be more good driving experiences than bad? Yes. It seems that from all my past ‘dents’ and ‘rips’, it is better to encourage someone to pick themselves up one more time and try again, rather than let them know all that they have done wrong.

No one ever said life is easy. Many of us have to experience things a couple of times before realizing the lesson. When we keep our perspectives and expectations in check, while speaking encouragement, we are free to laugh and sing while we put the pieces together from our real life ‘rips’ and ‘dents’.

The Ultimate Gift of a Coach...

2009-07-14T22:17:00.000-05:00

Thirteen days ago, I had arthroscopic knee surgery to remove a cyst that was growing out of the fibers on my Anterior Cruciate Ligament – more commonly referred to as the ACL. The surgery was a little different because the doctors decompressed this cyst rather than removing it and my ACL. RICE (Rest, Ice, Compression and Elevation) was my only task for nearly two weeks.

Yesterday it was back to TRIA Orthopaedic Center to remove the stitches. I was then sent directly to meet Monte, my physical therapist. After just two PT sessions with Monte, I’m pleased to announce that my knee is gaining much mobility, the fluid is decreasing and the pain is leaving. In fact, I feel that the knee is so much better that I have given my therapist the nickname, Miracle Monte. (Of course he laughed when I told him that.)

Today was my second appointment. While lying on the table receiving my well earned treat…use of the “Game Ready” ice machine, I had time to ponder about these brief, painful but helpful sessions I completed. Monte is my coach. He runs the game plan. When I perform at a mediocre level, he pushes me to do better. He believes I can do more and perform better with each session I work out with him. Monte has the road map; he knows my goals and is there to coach me through when I would prefer to give up.

Monte is a terrific coach because he has the ability to motivate while he trains. Because he continues to cheer me on and remind me of the progress I am making, I’m able to push through the tough times. He continues to raise the bar and asks me to reach higher, but never forgets to remind me of how far I have come.

The ability to encourage and inspire while guiding an individual to peak performance is a gift…the ultimate gift.

The folks at this orthopaedic center have a mission “Whatever your personal goals are, TRIA has the experts to work with you to help you achieve the highest level of function with the best outcome possible.” My goal of having a knee that functions properly is going to take much effort. Quite frankly, I would never be able to push myself to accomplish that goal, nor would I know how to do it on my own.

You may be a coach or you may be looking for a coach to guide you to a higher level of function with the best outcome possible. Wherever you are in life, remember the ultimate gift…encouraging and inspiring while leading.

A New Perspective on Calendar Management...

2009-07-10T19:54:00.000-05:00

Imagine walking into a room feeling confident, poised and energized. Your dreams are big and your motivation is high. You have your goals set, the action plan in place, you have even hired a coach to help you stay on track and keep pace with your demanding schedule. You live in a nice home in a great part of town and have a wonderful spouse and kids. There is so much to be thankful for. The warmth of the sunshine on your arms and the pleasant breeze blowing against your face are all reminders that life is good.

Then you look at the calendar for the next week. It seems to be filled with numbered black squares bursting with a rainbow of colours denoting each doctor appointment, early morning conference call, and after-hours meet and greet along with the vast array of children’s sporting activities that overlap and require permission slips and transportation.

Sure, life is hectic. We get by on too little sleep, promising to catch up on weekends. But we never do. To remain healthy and stay confident, poised and energized means being good to yourself too. Since the calendar refuses to clear itself, how about taking a new perspective to carve out some ‘play time’ for you?

How can you spend your play time? If you’re rattling off sports activities, forget it. Those don’t count. If you have forgotten how to play, break out the bubbles, kites, colouring books and most of all your imagination! Make up a game with rocks or loose change. Get some sidewalk chalk, a croquet set and some jacks; If you feel silly…good! If you don’t want the neighbors talking, join in with some kids or play with the dog.

Did you know that play time is one of the most healing activities for your health? Cut free from the rules, worry and stress. Most importantly, abandon your adult fixations and get in touch with your inner child. There’s a kid in all of us, just waiting for play time.

The place to improve the world is first in one’s own heart and head and hands. ~Robert M. Pirsig

The Power of Understanding...

2009-07-07T21:45:00.000-05:00

During my last visit to the dentist, I found that my hygienist, whom I had been seeing for the last 2 years, had resigned from her position. Her second child had arrived and she chose to partake in all the wonderful rewards of being an at home mom. (As an at-home mom for 11years, I’m a little biased). The young, new replacement hygienist with perfect white teeth introduced herself as she walked me to the dental chair. As I sat back, she asked me three or four questions, swiped a glance at my last x-rays and began to power back the head of my chair all in an orderly fashion. Her lack of conversation made me wonder if she was unhappy about something. I hoped she was not having a bad day because I was about to open my mouth and who knows what could happen next.

Thankfully the new gal was rather gentle but still diligent with her task. At one point during the initial exam of my teeth, she removed her utensils. I used that moment to ask a question. Her response caught me off guard a bit. She answered with a yes because we “had enough time”. I looked around and did not see any stop watch or schedule posted to know if we were ahead or behind schedule, yet she seemed very ‘aware’ of the clock. Inside I felt awkward because I wasn’t sure if I had taken too much time or asked a dumb question. Basically, I wasn’t sure how to read her response and I was missing my bubbly, sociable hygienist that I had grown to adore.
The rest of the checkup went smoothly and I was on my way after having another A+ visit. All the way home, I was thinking about how different that checkup was compared to what I have experienced in the last 2 years. The only new variable was a new person.

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks - My previous hygienist was a very outgoing, people oriented type of person, while the new hygienist was more reserved and quite task oriented. I did not do anything wrong nor was there any problems with the care I was given. What I failed to realize at the time, was that these two ladies were different personalities and viewed life through different lens!

Here’s what we know…theoretically the world can be divided into two. There are people who are people oriented and there are people who are more task oriented. Neither is right nor wrong, they are just different.

The first hygienist who cared for me was on the people side – she would always ask how I was doing, how my kids were, what our family was up to…things like that. To be honest, it took forever to get started with the checkup because she and I would chat and chat and chat. I too am an outgoing person and appreciate the people connection. On the other hand, the second hygienist saw the task ahead of her and most likely because she was new, wanted to do things “by the book” and make a good impression. She was focused on her assignment and getting done on time. Again, neither is right nor wrong, the approaches were just different.

All in all, I realized that if I would have thought more about the new hygienist given her personality and situation of being the new kid on the block, I could have helped ease any nerves and showed more interest in her…instead of expecting the reverse. Sometimes we all just need to be reminded that taking time to understand the other person can usually improve a relationship.

An interesting side note to this story…when I told my husband about the experience I had encountered at the dentist, his only comment was, “Sounds like I would like the new hygienist. After all, we go to the dentist to have our teeth cleaned, don’t we?” Ah…the power of understanding people!

Declaring Independence...

2009-07-04T19:34:00.000-05:00

Independence Day - Fourth of July. Americans love their freedoms. Freedom to travel where they want, choose the home they live in, pick a career and a lifestyle. We even sing about the land of the free and the home of the brave. The Declaration of Independence embodies the values of Americans; the right of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

On this Independence Day 2009, I find myself reflecting on freedoms of all kinds as I lie on the couch recovering from knee surgery just two days prior. With a pillow under my affected leg and bandages covering the stitches, I’m forced to take things slowly. My family is ‘on call’ 24/7 because the ability to run up the steps quickly to get my glasses or scoot into the kitchen for a sandwich is quite difficult for me. Ironic isn’t it? That today, July 4th, is the day that America is celebrating our country’s freedom with family gatherings, cookouts and fireworks and here I sit completely DEpendent on others for help.

By in large, I am a person, who loves freedom. I prefer to be in control, to have the freedom to change my mind and to have a variety of choices for how to live my life. Independence and freedom are comfort zones for me. But today, I’m taking time to appreciate all that I have and the amazing potential that is before me.

This focus on freedom reminded me of something that Robert Kiyosaki’s wife Kim wrote in her book Rich Woman…“With every little victory you accomplish, your confidence increases. Increased confidence leads to higher self-esteem. Higher self-esteem leads to greater success, which ultimately leads to the greatest gift of all – freedom.”

The Declaration of Independence was a victory for America. In turn, this country gained confidence and esteem which ultimately led to our greatest gift of freedom. For you and me, each personal victory elevates certainty and value. The freedom we’ve gained from those events is something to appreciate.

What personal victories have you experienced? Today may be the time for you to reflect on the freedom and independence you have gained and declare your future potential.

Do You Have Double Vision?

2009-06-30T22:03:00.000-05:00

I’ve heard it said…’If you do today what others won’t…you can live tomorrow like others can’t’. It makes complete sense. I know how I want my life to look tomorrow; I’ve played the video over and over in my mind for years. How hard could it possibly be? Just do a few important things each day and eventually my tomorrow will become a reality. There you have it; simple, right?

However, along the journey toward my blissful tomorrow, I have found one thing that seems to be extremely important yet most difficult to achieve. It is the act of self-discipline – training and controlling myself and my conduct to progress toward my goals and dreams.

Writing this blog holds a measure of self-discipline. I have a goal in place for posting new material, yet the calendar days flip by like a speeding race car. Today, I find myself caught between what I want to do and what I know I need to do. Obviously I have not yet mastered self-discipline, but it has become evident that self-discipline should occur first before my vision of tomorrow will become a reality. This develops into a ‘first this, then that’ type of scenario. A form of double vision - having one eye focused on today and the other eye focused on tomorrow.

Double vision for my teenager means in order for her to achieve her career goals tomorrow, she needs to focus on each class in school, which will add to, or subtract from, her GPA today.

Double vision in my role as mother, says that each and every time I stand firm while teaching values and obedience to my children today, I’m grooming them for a future tomorrow of significance and strength.

What are your eyes fixed on for today and tomorrow?

It will require self-discipline to keep one eye fixed on the important things which ought to be done today. There is an old saying that…’discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons’. If that is the case, might I suggest that we have the self-discipline to accomplish what is important today; so that we can be free tomorrow to live our destiny (without regret)!

Connecting Face-to-Face and Heart-to-Heart...

2009-06-26T18:57:00.000-05:00

After months of not seeing each other, a good friend and I met recently for coffee. Our lives travel slightly different roads right now, but there remains a firm foundation in which our values, interests and families are similar. Because of the long absence, there were many updates for each of us to share. However, I was astonished to see that three hours disappeared in a flash. While driving home that afternoon alone with my thoughts in my minivan, I reflected on the special time I just had with my friend. My spirits were lifted, I felt calmer and more at peace. A new energy was present. I was refreshed and ready to get back to my life.

We seem to get so lost in our daily routine and before we know it, days, weeks and months have disappeared. Our first instinct is to throw out a quick email or text to ‘check-in’ with our friend…when deep inside, what we really desire is to laugh, share and connect face to face and heart to heart.

Now you are probably, thinking how can I fit it in? Have you seen my schedule? One thing that might help you get started making more connections, is to make an appointment. Schedule your connection time with your friends just like you would to see the doctor, dentist or go on a vacation. There are a couple of ways I plan my connection time. One group of my friends gets together the last Tuesday of every month. We call it Mom’s Night Out. Husbands and children are not allowed. There are times that some are not able to make it so they just plan for the next month. Additionally, my family knows in advance that I’m unavailable that night because it is on the calendar. Another friend and I meet on the 13th of the month, no matter what day of the week it is. Again, it’s on the calendar.

Putting a priority on maintaining relationship with your friends and family is just as vital as success in business place. A blend of the two areas can create a happier, healthier you. Believe me…YOU are worth it! Flip the Switch and reconnect with someone today.

Mountain Moving...

2009-06-23T13:15:00.000-05:00

I just got off the phone with a Pastor friend of mine. Today’s topic of conversation was about moving the mountains in our life. No we didn’t speak about the gigantic obstacles of world hunger or economic turmoil. We talked of the everyday challenges that everyday people experience - the ones that pop up when your day is progressing in an effortless manner. Things like the annoying flat tire on your way to work, the torrential rainfall on the weekend of your family camping trip or the endless waiting period to get an answer on a job or home purchase.

Yesterday, a mountain presented itself in the middle of my preplanned agenda. After numerous visits to a variety of doctors, yesterday was the day that my ailing knee would be repaired. I was energized with the thought that I would find relief of pain after one year and get on with my life. Needless to say, this new doctor realized that the procedure we were about to do, was not the best course of action for my condition. Once again, MY plan was aborted and I was forced to switch gears. All the way home, I whined, complained and yelled at God. My pity party was complete when I grumbled with disgust that I always have to scratch and claw to get everything in life but for others, things come very easily.

Have you ever been walking down the street and see someone acting irrational? You say to yourself, “They are making such a fool of themselves”, only to look back on your own behavior and realize your foolishness just the prior day?

Yesterday I was completely convinced that I had a right to vent about my circumstance. Then today a dear friend, shares Mark 11:23 “Whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be removed…” and my foolishness became clear. I was trying to move the mountain on my own.

The truth is, there will always be a mountain, sometime big sometimes small. From experience, I know there also will be someone there to help you move it. It is natural to react in a foolish way when the mountain presents itself. However, it's much more helpful to listen to the people in your life that have been placed near you to help you through.

What is your mountain? Is it new or has it been there awhile? Do you have more than one? Trust that God has a plan and has put people in your life to help you get the mountain out of the way.

Lessons from a Teenager...

2009-06-19T15:23:00.000-05:00

Each stage of a child’s life is unique and fresh. I remember how thankful I was when my oldest daughter was able to get herself dressed, put on her own shoes and most of all…no more diapers! It seemed I had arrived at a whole new level of motherhood. I rejoiced in the little independent person she was becoming.

Today, that same daughter is 16 years old, gainfully employed, driving my mini van and has a boyfriend. The level of independence has dramatically increased but my rejoicing has diminished considerably. I am now learning to let go once again and find the joy in her independence…but in a whole new way.

When my daughter was recently applying for a job we began discussing what the potential employer might ask her in an interview. Then when they hired her, she had questions about how her first day might transpire. The questions kept coming one right after another. Thankfully I have learned and teach the Model of Human Behavior, so I understand that this daughter is ‘wired to wonder’. She has a natural tendency to need a lot of information, so she can be at peace and feel prepared. I, on the other hand, thought that she should just jump in with both feet because it would be an adventure.

The little voice in my head said, “You don’t know what you don’t know.” The reality is that my daughter had never done anything like this before, so she had no frame of reference to guide her.

When life events happen, there are lessons to be learned. The good news is that I can learn something from everyone…even a 16 year old. As the parent in this situation, what I learned was to adopt some of the ‘BE Attitudes’. In order to best help my daughter, I needed to:
BE Loving – no matter what happened
BE the Adult – answer her questions from my experience
BE Real – let her know that I was nervous too
BE Gracious – allow her to share her fears and her excitement while I LISTEN
BE Creative – give her some examples of how people answer interview questions
BE a Fan – cheer for her through it all

Is there somewhere you can adopt and apply the ‘BE Attitudes’ in your life today? Remember, what you say is important and what you do is significant.

Cool WIP Guarantee...

2009-06-16T13:46:00.000-05:00

With a degree in Accounting and after spending several years in the financial world, the acronym WIP came up frequently.

In the business world WIP is a Work in Progress; work that has not been completed but has already incurred a capital investment. Investopedia.com explains that WIP is usually recorded as an asset (a resource with economic value with the expectation that it will provide future benefit) on the balance sheet. (Stick with me here - I guarantee this post will get more cool.) They state that WIP indicates any good that is not considered to be a final product, but must still be accounted for because funds have been invested toward its production. Now...let’s break that down and find the key points:

WIP:
Work in Progress
Work not yet completed
Already incurred an investment
An asset
A resource with value expecting to provide future benefit
Any good not yet finished
Accounted for because an investment has been made

WOMEN:
A work in progress
A work not yet completed
Already incurred an investment in life
An asset
A resource with value that can provide future benefit
A good work not yet finished
Want to be accountable because of prior investments made

Can't help but notice the similarities, huh?!

Whether you feel your life is like a flower bud ready to burst or you are a flower bulb lying in the ground, I guarantee you are a work in progress! You ARE a good work not yet finished! And here's the cool part...The world is waiting to experience the beauty and splendor of who YOU are becoming.

Today you can pass along the Cool WIP Guarantee to your girlfriends and show them who you are becoming.

Why not do what you do with a passion, because it’s your only life. ~Anonymous

Introducing...

2009-06-07T22:33:00.000-05:00

COMING SOON!

A resource designed to encourage, educate and equip real women for the real world. Excuse our mess right now - this blog is a work in progress. But check back often to share in the growth. Until then, have an inspirational day.